Clace (Liberty High School) (Completed)

44. The Unveiling

Author's Note: Warning! Clarissa's nightmare gets a little detailed. Not too detailed, but enough for me to write this.

Clarissa

Could it all have been just a nightmare? It...it felt SO real! My hands felt like they were being held down. My midriff felt the cold air hit it as Jace pulled my shirt up. I...I  felt him..force himself....into....me. No! I saw...it. He's lying to me! Manipulating me! How else would I know what IT looks like? I could draw a picture of it! "Jace, I know what you did! I know you hurt me! I don't believe you!" I yell.

"Red, I thought we were making progress. Please just open your eyes," Jace responds.

"Jace, I...I fell for it once. I'm not going to fall for it again! I believed you, until I remembered what your...private parts....look like. If it was just a dream, how do I know? Huh? If it was just a dream, why did it hurt so bad? Why did I want to die, so it could end? Why did I think I deserved it? Why did I feel your....your hands on me?" I cry and Jace just looks at me.

"Red, you walked in on me....naked after the first night I slept with you." I...I remember that. Angel! My whole theory was based on Jace and his private parts. What have I done? "I...I was so embarrassed, I'll never forget it. I don't know why it hurt! I would never hurt you! If we ever.....I would make sure I was gentle with you. You wanted to die because after everything you've been through, you felt like when you were finally opening up, I made you go through it all again.....physically. Angel Red! You're killing me! My hands....they've been on your body before, but only in places that you've okayed. You didn't deserve it! You have NEVER deserved it! You deserve so much more than what you've been given. You deserve a loving dad, who threatens your boyfriends and eats ice cream with you when your sad. A dad who can name all of your ships and recite your favorite song lyrics. A dad who loves you unconditionally. Most importantly, you deserve a dad who would NEVER lay a hand or any other body part on you. A dad who would kill anyone who ever made you sad. You deserve a better boyfriend too. A boyfriend who isn't trying to battle his own inner demons. Who can solely focus on collecting your broken pieces. And piece by piece putting you back together, until you're as whole as you'll ever be. Who doesn't have scars. Who isn't pathetic. Who isn't constantly scared he's going to hurt you like his dad did his mom. Who can give you everything you deserve. And Red, you deserve someone better than I could ever be," Jace replies. This Jace! This is the Jace I love! This is the Jace that makes me feel special! This is the Jace I wake up to. This is the Jace that doubts himself and is always careful with me. That Jace, he isn't my Jace. This Jace! This is my Jace!

I slowly open my eyes, and I see my room, I can feel the pajamas on my body. I see Jace's fully clothed body on my desk chair with a pizza. I bury my head into my knees and start crying. My Jace is a mess. What have I put him through? Jace's face is deep red and blochy. His beautiful blonde hair is tossed. His blue and half blue half brown eyes are red inflamed with tears. His golden hands are on his face. I said all of those nasty horrible things to him, and he just took them in. I've broken my Jace! I feel a warm body sit next to me, and Jace stares at me. I want to be in his arms. Feel his safe embrace and lay there until I can't possibly lay there any longer. I know I don't deserve it. "Red, what can I do? Please anything! I'll leave! I...I won't come back for as long as you don't want me here. I'll get Izzy? Simon? Your mom is at work but I can call her, and she'll get here as fast as she can. I'll do anything, just please tell me what to do," Jace cries.

"Jace, I'm so sorry. I..I don't deserve what I want. Not after what I've done to you," I reply.

"Red, please," Jace begs. He....he still wants to help me. After everything that I've put him through. I basically called him a lying manipulating rapist! And he still wants to help you. You don't deserve this, but....the idea of being in Jace's arms is too much.

"Jace, I...I just want you to.....to hold me," I confess. "I want to feel safe in your arms, but I know I don't deserve that. Jace, I'm sorry for putting you through all of this. That nightmare, it felt so real. I shouldn't known you'd never hurt me. It...it just felt SO real!"

Jace

"Red, are you sure you want me to hold you?" I skeptically ask. After her nightmare, she wants ME to hold her?

Clarissa

"Jace, I feel like a freak. I knew you don't want to hold me. I...I understand, it's okay," I manage to hold back the tears.

"Red, of course I want to hold you!" Jace defends. "I...I just didn't know if you really want that since I...I was in your nightmare. I just want to make sure.....I mean you can always tell me to let you go and I'll oblige."

"Jace, just please hold me tight," I reply. Jace comes closer to me and wraps me into his arms. His warm safe arms embrace my shaking waist. My hands clutch to his chest. I rest my head on him and slip into the blackness. This time in a feeling of safety and peace.

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I do not own any of the Mortal Instruments books, materials, etc. All credit belongs to Cassandra Clare.

Author's Note:
This is my first fanfic. I hope you guys like it! Please leave comments, votes, and feedback. I'm going to update, when I'm done and it'll be random.

Originally posted: 2/12/18