15 Reasons Why | "You Could Save Her?"

Cassette 2: Side B

I lift my head up since I was hurting my neck. I close my eyes and vision Rikkun. The way she ran. How she climbed and timed every single step. I felt something touch my nose. I open my eyes to see. A pink leaf. None of the trees were pink. Not in this state and town. I pick the leaf and place it in my hand. Was this one of her little games? I look up to the edge of the roof. No one.
I push Play and place the earbuds in to listen. I popped the next side of the case in.
She was humming then had stopped.
Marshall, was it? Austin. I had almost forgotten about you. Yours is pretty short, since I did make a stop. No you didn't do anything wrong. But you knew.
What did he do?
I don't remember how we met. But it was still in Middle school, and now. Every morning I'd go to the library with my peers. Including asshole, David. Which he had been following me acting like he had a group. Prick. Austin, you one day, as flattering as you sound and seem; you told me I looked beautiful and pushed the bangs out of my eyes to a side. From what I heard, you broke up with your girlfriend who I don't know and I don't care. So the last thing on my mind to think was that you believed what David has spread out. Things like I'm so easy. Austin, there was times where you would try to walk me home. You never use to do that. So going back to that morning.
"Thanks, but I'm not really interested in your set up. I know it sounds like a friend-zone thing, but thats life. I think it's better if you stopped following in something you think its meant."
You eyes darted in shade. You didn't like that. Weeks later you did stop. And you got back with your ex. What happened anyways? Were you trying to use me to get her upset? That's a shit move.
I got up and walked around the school. Hoping to see a ladder up.
You Austin, Miguel, and a few others who names I will not mention. You all sat with David. What friends you are. The black cat and the hound dog sitting next to a abusive jerk. You all saw but never said a word. So yes I do have the right to snap.
Her voice sounded angrier. And if I'd listen carefully I could hear her small growls.
You all laughed. And I hated it. Seeing that every time at lunch. I felt sick. So sick that I skipped eating for a long time at lunch. So thank you.
I wish I was there. At least to have been a close friend to you.
I'll add another name to this short tape. Mr. Adkins. Xavier, but I like calling you Javier. 
What did he do? I know you two seem to be good maybe not so close friends, but Rikkun, you always had a smile. I'm so confused.
I see a ladder up to the roof just between the elementary and preschool. The lock was popped open. Like someone knew already. I ascend up.
Javier, when I first saw and heard of you, you never did scare me. Honestly you never seem to make a point in my mind. Sounded a little rude, yeah? Anyways, I got to know you in Summer school. Just like Miguel, we all sat together. You took the honor of walking me home. I didn't mind. In fact, I think you use to live around my block. Correct me if I'm wrong. Until you popped the question up when allowed you inside my home.
"I thought you use to date David?"
I didn't answer you. Why? Because that brought me to believe you've heard about all the schemes he had done to me. Though, David, you know I'm keeping alot from public. Not to save you, but for me. Javier you "teased" me since I was shorter than you. I still am. No problem with that. Yeah just take my phone and tease how short I am. Kinda made it seemed like you liked me. How could I know? Maybe you were just waiting for an opening in me. An easy target.
I reached the top. The wind was fine. Finally getting back on my feet.
So what did I do? Did I follow your little game? Perhaps I did. But I didn't let you find any openings. Once you realized, you gave me my phone back. And that was that. You listened to a false rumor. Just like everyone else. I don't hate you. But it is sad.
Last day of summer school, they handed us papers. I passed one class and failed the other. But I still passed. Miguel passed, I think. Not sure about you Javier. I don't remember much anymore. Maybe that's why I'm so clung to riddles.
Rikkun sat at the edge of the roof. I wanted to walk to her. I didn't move. Her black jacket and short hair, she had changed. But is it really her?
You laughed too, Javier, didn't you?
I felt a pain hit my gut.
I took a step, but as soon as I did her head spun to see behind her. She wasn't wearing her glasses. Her brown eyes seem to be frightened. Those eyes. Her eyes dart to the recorder.
The recorder stopped. It was rewinding.
How could I know?
The tape stops. Before I could say her name she was gone. The moment I look back to see. I let myself fall to my knees. Did she do that? Was it part of it? Is she trying to tell me something?
Maybe I'm just going crazy.
My phone buzzes. It was mom. She's asking for me to come home. Now. I pull the buds out from my ear and look back to the ladder. This is more than a listening game. Isn't it Rikkun?