To Raise the Dead- Book Three

Ch. 11- Hell is Empty

"What survived may not be kind but its me."

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The afterlife is unimaginable. People go to church and pray to a god that is not real so they can have some sort of answer to what it's like after death. But here is the cold hard truth: there is no god and no heaven. There is only darkness and the guilt of all the people I've hurt. I had no one to comfort me while I was dead that I feel somewhat numb as I lay in this bed trying to go to sleep. It is the only thing I wish for all these months, and now I cannot even rest my eyes. 

How can I? How can I just accept the fact that I'm alive. After months of total isolation, I don't know how to be a living person with a heartbeat. And really, why was I brought back in the first place? It doesn't make any damn sense. 

I leaned on the edge of the balcony, feeling the fresh breeze that came with spring. From this viewpoint, everything below seemed like I was a giant. The sun was shining, and the flowers around the castle started blooming again. Queen Audrey's garden started to become alive again. A season of rebirth. How ironic is that? 

When my body started pumping blood again, everything changed. And I don't know how I feel about it. This body is not mine, not anymore. A warm hand glazed my ear gently and I closed my eyes for a moment. The touch of someone else still surprised me at times. "Every time I see you with those pointy ears, I can't breathe." he whispered from behind me. I touched my own with my tops of my fingers, feeling the point of what made me different. I was now only a Fae, made of the elements of the Earth and it's immortality that it offers. 

I turned to face him now and he was smiling big. Bigger than I have ever seen in a long time. His hazelnut hair glowed in the sunlight and his onyx colored eyes stared into my own like he never wanted to let go of me just yet. He is the love of my life, I thought. He is he is he is. If death wants him, then it just going to have to take both of us then. "It seems odd to have these." I admitted. "I don't know anyone who has ears like an actual Fae." 

He placed a strand of my scarlet-red hair behind my ear and caressed my cheek. "I thought you would like them."

I could still remember the night I died, could still recall the words Sebastian said before I took my last breath. It was a vow, a promise that we will have our forever. And that is what I promised, no matter how many obstacles we face, I will be right beside him. It seemed he was thinking the exact thing I was, I could see it in his expression. 

"You know what I said that night, don't you?" he asked. 

I nodded my head once, feeling my heart beat faster every second. "You asked me to marry you, Sebastian. While I was bleeding out, you asked me to be your wife. And then I died." 

There was a pause between us, and then he spoke with utter confidence that I couldn't help but smile. "Elora Miller, I love you. When I met you, there was a part of me that knew that you were going to be a big part of my long life. You make me go absolute insane at times, you don't know how bad I was when you weren't here with me. It felt like I was dying from the inside out. And now that you're here--" He inched closer to me now. "I want to be with you forever, until the world ends and we are nothing but ashes in the universe. I love you from death to life. My heart is yours if you let me. And I would greatly love for you to not only be my partner, but my Queen." 

Tears ran my cheeks at a rapid speed. What he was saying to me confessed everything that he felt for me when I was gone. And him looking at me with his deep colored eyes, I could not think. Despite everything we have gone through, my feelings for him never changed. And they never will be. I realized that I wanted to be his forever. To be with him through all the troubles of our immortal life. There is nothing I want in this world then to be his Queen. 

"Yes." I whispered. "A thousand times yes, Sebastian. I fell in love with everything that you are and I would gladly accept. Even after everything we've been through, I want nothing then to be your wife."

He smiled, a big one at that. It was like the sun exploded and there was nothing but his genuine smile. It was something out of this world, this person that has been through so much that he never smiled like that. Except for right now. He placed both of his hands on either side of my cheeks and kissed me slowly. In between the kisses he whispered, "Thank you." 

"I love you so much, Elora Miller."

The sun beamed on his skin and it made me wonder if he was a god. But I wasn't sure because I never saw one when I was dead. I didn't deserve to go up there, I thought, I was made to go down where the rest of all the horrible people are. Sebastian's eyebrows scrunched together in concern. "What are you thinking about?"

I turned back to look at garden again. It was there that I realized that Sebastian was no one to fear. In his own ways, he has good intentions. "I remember all of it. I remember when I was dead." I told him. 

"You do?" 

"It wasn't sunshine and rainbows, Sebastian. I didn't see my parents or Christian, I was totally alone. There was nothing but darkness." 

He placed a hand on my cheek, reassuring me that I'm here. That I'm alive. "Elora, you are no longer there. You are with me and you're family and that's all that matters." 

I couldn't deny that it still affected me. That there will always be some sort of darkness that will live in my soul for as long as I'm alive. And I really don't think I could face that again. Not after everything I've been through. So, looking at Sebastian, I faked a smile and placed my arms around him so he would know I believe him. And I do, in a way. 

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sorry for the hiatus, I haven't had the energy to write for a very long time. But I'm back now and more things are coming. So stay tuned guys!