HIRED GUN // H.S AU

forty-six

AMARA

I expected to wake up with a pounding headache, my ass hurting from sitting on the cold bathroom tiles all night. I expected to open my eyes to see Harry gone, no evidence of him ever being here. I expected Louis and Zayn to walk into the bathroom wondering where the fuck I was, and becoming shell shocked when they saw me a mess on the bathroom floor.

And for once, my expectations had been lived up to.

My head killed, my ass cheeks hurt every time I took a step, Harry was gone, and Louis and Zayn looked at me like I was Britney during her meltdown phase. I was a small bit surprised Harry had left without even waking me, and curious as to if he even remembered last night.

"Don't even ask," I muttered as I dragged myself out of the bathroom, Louis and Zayn moving out of the way so I could stomp into the kitchen. I rubbed on my temple as I poured my coffee straight from the pot, leaving it black before chugging it relentlessly.

"Harry has to come over later to discuss some things, if you don't wanna see him you can stay in the bedroom," Louis grabbed the coffee pot for himself, adding milk and sugar generously. I sighed heavily when the code knock was heard from the front door, making my way to the bedroom.

"Hey mate," I heard Louis greet Harry from the door as I closed the door to the bedroom, not allowing myself to look at the man before doing so. It was silent for a few moments, Harry's response yet to come. "What are you looking in there for?"

"Nothing," I sucked in a breath when I heard Harry's voice, falling back onto the bed as they continued to discuss their work. I curled up into a ball in the middle of the bed, feeling my muscles relax at the soft surface. It was a huge improvement from the bathroom floor.

My fingernails dug into my palms when I spotted Louis' suitcase, his clothing crumpled and sprawled around. I shot up when I couldn't take my eyes off the mess, sitting next to it as I began folding the clothing neatly. 

Once I finished and was satisfied, I realised I would eventually have to go back to Harry and I's room to grab some clothes and necessities, and what better time to do that than when he's here? That way, I wouldn't have to awkwardly face him or talk to him. I opened the bedroom door as quietly as humanly possible, slipping out when I didn't spot anybody around. It was the perfect opportunity when I walked out into the kitchen with none of the boys in sight, assuming they were in the room they'd set up with their electronics.

I spotted Harry's jacket on the bench, checking his pocket for the room keys, smiling when I felt my fingertips graze the metal. I closed the door behind me when I successfully got out, unlocking the door a few metres away. Once I'd gotten inside the apartment, I grabbed one of my duffel bags, stuffing it with random clothes from my suitcase and things I'd need for a couple days. I knew I'd have to return back after a few days, because Harry was my assigned bodyguard, but a few days away would hopefully cleanse me.

I couldn't help the small squeal that came out of my mouth when I opened the front door, Harry's towering frame already standing there, patting down his pockets for his keys, I presumed. Harry's eyes flew up to me when I squealed, his shoulder stopping me from walking out of the hotel room.

"Can we talk?" He asked, hope lurking in his tone. I shook my head, but he didn't seem to be taking no for an answer, his body staying glued to the frame and not allowing me to leave. "Please?"

"Well I don't really have a choice, do I?"

"You always have a choice," Harry pushed his body into the hotel room, completely disregarding his statement when he closed the door behind him. I turned on my heels, walking to the kitchen. I rested my backside on the bench while Harry walked in, waiting for him to begin talking.

"You can't ignore this forever, I'm your bodyguard and you're going to have to let me do my job. You need to stop being childish and running to the other boys' when I do something that hurts your feelings," Harry remained serious as he spoke, my head snapping to him. I wasn't expecting him to apologise or express his feelings, but I also wasn't expecting to get scolded for being "childish."

"Do you remember this morning?" I managed to let out, my throat constricting as he stared emotionlessly at me from across the room. I'd seen the look the day prior, and it didn't end very well.

"Yes, I was drunk and didn't even know what I was saying," Harry defended himself, all hope I'd had slowly disintegrating. I wasn't sure whether he was persuading me or himself, and I hoped to god it was himself.

"You're lying, you knew exactly what you were saying," I stated calmly, breathing deeply as I kept myself collected. I didn't want to blow up on him and seem like a psycho girlfriend that was forcing him to like me.

"I didn't mean anything I said."

"You're lying!" I screamed, not caring about how crazy I looked anymore. He seemed taken aback by the volume and ferociousness of my voice but I wasn't backing down, I needed to know the truth. "Why'd you say the things you said then? Just to cut deeper into my wounds, to hurt me even more than you have already?"

"I will not allow myself to feel for you, to care for you. I can't, I will end up hurting you," Harry's voice shook as he spoke, his eyes avoiding mine completely.

"What do you mean, hurt me? You're hurting me now! I just want to know if you feel the same way I feel about you," I begged, pushing myself off the counter to walk up to the rattled man. He was fighting a battle in his own mind.

"Even if I do, it doesn't matter. You're going to end up hurt," Harry stepped back as I walked towards him, stopping when his back hit the wall behind him.

"Do you care about me?" I rested my hand on Harry's chest, sliding it up to grasp his chin in my thumb and pointer finger, pulling it down to connect our eyes.

"I can't-"

"Then show me," I brought my lips to his ear, softly biting on his earlobe as his breathing increased.