problematic ➳ reddie

52

april ❀ age 14 -15

so there they stood. watching how a small casket was lowered under ground. almost all of the people of the small town of derry had gathered in the grave yard. bill stared how his little brother was buried underground, sniffles around him. everyone was quiet. only the sound of church bells in the background, chiming in terrifying slow tune.

he wasn't crying, no. he hadn't cried once since georgie's body had found near the edge of derry, half floating in the water. when the police department informed they had found him, cause of death, drowning, bill didn't cry. he looked how his parents broke down in front of him, blaming him for killing his brother and screaming into his emotionless face, calling him a psychopath for letting a six year old boy wonder around town in the evening when it was raining.

richie was standing on his other side, eddie standing next to him and mike towering next to eddie. stan was on bill's other side, ben next to him and beverly squeezing ben's hand next to him.

bill didn't turn his gaze away from the casket when he slowly began to search stan's hand with his fingers, finally finding it and tangling them together. stan looked down at their hands, giving bill's hand a light squeeze.

after the burying was over, the guests headed to the main building.

"hey bill?" richie caught up with the boy dressed in black, who was still holding stan's hand. "betty said she was sorry she wouldn't make it. they had a thing in Augusta. she's really sorry"

"thanks" bill said quietly and let go of stan's hand and walked alone towards the main building. the other losers walked to richie and stan who looked after him with hesitant eyes.

"is he alright?" ben asked.

"he's brother just got buried underground, what'd you think" eddie said.

"no i mean...he's not crying or anything...he seems calm" ben explain. "almost too calm"

"calm before the storm" mike stated and everyone got a chill in their back.

"he's gonna break down at some point and it's not gonna be pretty" bev said.

"we have to be there for him" stan said and began walking towards the main building, everyone following. "if and when he breaks down, he shouldn't be alone"

"but we don't know when's that gonna happen" richie said.

nobody replied after that. they just walked to the building in silence, hanging their coats on the hangers seeing bill standing by the side table, looking at a picture of georgie.

"should we go talk to him?" eddie asked from stan, who knew bill the best. even better than richie, who has been with him longer.

"maybe not yet..." stan said. "let's give him a second"

"georgie, he...he usually sat there in the garage next to me, watching how I worked and asked questions all the time. like, what are you doing now...I never got tired of it" zack denbrough stood up, glass in his hands while the rest of the guests were smiling sadly.

bill was staring at his empty plate, stan keeping his eyes on him.

"I just...I wish I would've been more careful the day he went missing" zack's voice shivered and glared at bill who looked up and gripped the table cloth. stan noticed this and was about to grab bill's hand but the other boy got up and quietly left the room.

stan looked at richie, nodding towards the door, the two going after bill, who was now walking along the hallway towards the bathroom.

"his dad sucks" richie said as they got nearer the bathroom.

"you think? he's such an asshole to bill" stan grimaced in disgust and pushed the bathroom doors open, seeing bill leaning against the sinks, breathing heavily.

"billy?" stan asked softly and took careful steps towards the shaking boy. richie stood by the door, watching intently how stan got closer and finally touched bill's shoulder. and that's when the shorter one spun around and collapsed onto stan's arms. he wrapped his arms around stan's shoulders and leaned his whole body against the peanut hues, who confused tied his arms around bill's back.

"ih-it's muh-my fuh-fuh-fault stan...they buh-blame muh-me..." bill sobbed, tears streaming down from his face as he sunk on his knees, stan following him and soon bill was laying on stan's lap, hands wrapped around stan's torso, head shoved against his stomach. "muh-my fault"

"no, it's not...it's not your fault" stan stroked bill's hair and looked over his shoulder at richie, who looked shocked at bill, sadness in his eyes. he has never seen bill like this.

"buh-but-"

"shhhh, not your fault" stan cut bill off, pulling him closer and lightly kissing bill's hair and then lifting his head up. "look at me"

bill stared into stan's eyes, lips trembling in distress. he had tears on his cheeks, which stan wiped away. "it's not your fault. you were sick and you couldn't have gone out into the rain. you would've gotten worse, pneumonia maybe. who knows. your parents were able to go out with him. but you were sick, alright? you didn't know this was gonna happen"

bill shut his eyes and let out a sob. "you p-p-promised he was g-gonna buh-be okay" his voice broke down.

"i know, i'm sorry" stan frowned and hugged bill, feeling bill nuzzle his face in the crook of his neck. "i know you were lying t-to muh-make me fuh-feel better"

stan felt tears prickle in his eyes too. he blinked them away and nodded. "i'm still sorry"

"it's okay" bill whispered against stan's neck, then feeling another pair of hands wrap around his body. he didn't need to look to know richie was kneed next to them, other hand around stan's back and other around bill's.

"you can stay over at our house, bill" richie told to the other who nodded. "we're here"

there was a small knock on the door and a creak as it opened, revealing the rest of the losers.

"everything okay?" bev asked, noticing bill sobbing against stan's shoulder. nobody replied. eddie stepped from behind mike and walked to the three boys on the floor, dropping down too and put his arms so that other one was touching richie and other stan, but that his face was next to bill. he kissed his cheek lightly and pressed his head against the sobbing boy.

and not long until all of the seven kids were in a group hug, bill feeling comfortable around his friends.

eddie turned his head, so that he was looking at richie, who had a sad smile on his face. eddie flashed him a smirk, where the other replied with an even wider smirk.

"the others are probably missing us on the table" ben said quietly, yet nobody moved from the hug. bill had calmed down. he let out sniffles every now and then but wasn't a sobbing mess anymore.

"probably" mike shrugged, but still nobody moved.

"fuck 'em" richie replied and hugged the friends around him tighter.

-

a/n many of you guys are asking is pennywhore in this, and no. i didn't change the plot. pennywise is not in this, don't worry. but I can't say that there wouldn't be references to clowns or spooders.