Martinez Twins Imagines ✔

Ivan - You Cut Yourself

T R I G G E R W A R N I N G: if you don't like reading about ANYTHING that has to do with SELF HARM I suggest you skip and/or do not read this chapter.

Y/N Pov:

I couldn't handle this pain anymore. It wasn't physical or anything. It was just emotional pain. I have been feeling this way for too long. At this point I wanted to end it. I felt too depressed to do anything. Everyone was out of the house. It was the right time to do it. All I had to do was end this suffering and have no worries after it was done with.

I looked up at the mirror. I haven't wore make up in months. I had dark circles under my eyes. My eyes were all puffy and red from how long I've been crying. I cried so much that I had no tears left to cry out. I looked to my right to see the water almost over flowing the bathtub. I quickly stopped the water. I walked back to the sink.

I picked up the razor I have used many times on my arms and legs. I had cut myself so many times that I was used to the pain. The physical pain I caused myself was now all too numb to me to feel anything. As I took one last look at the dried, bloody razor, I quickly set it close to my arm. I cut my arm with the razor.

I made another bloody line with it again and again and again and again. I had done the same to my other arm and my thighs. At this point I decided to drop it in the sink. There was too much blood on my arms and thighs. It was quickly dripping down my body. I slowly walked to the bathtub and got in.

I slowly sat in the hot water. Before I went under the water I whispered to myself:

"Forgive me Ivan."

I finally went under the water and didn't hold my breath. Everything was too blurry to me. I could here mumbling on the other side of the door. The bathtub was bloody red. I could hear someone knocking on the door and then the door slowly opening. That person gasped and quickly walked towars me. He grabbed me so I wasn't drowning myself.

"Baby, no." Ivan was crying.

I had no expression on my face. My whole body felt numb.

"No!"

I coughed up the water that had gone down my throat. I looked at Ivan. My eyes were slowly closing. I had lost so much blood. Ivan cupped my face.

"Stay awake babe! Call the ambulance!"

I saw Tessa, Emilio, and Kade. They started freaking out and Kade instantly grabbed his phone. I could feel my eyes getting heavier and heavier by the minute.

"Stay awake baby! Please!"

"I love you." I tried to say to Ivan but it came out hoarsed. My throat felt dry.

"I love you too." He said back as he sniffled.

"I can't lose you now. Not now and not ever."

I smiled a small smile. Everyone's voices were becoming not so clear anymore. It was like when you're underwater and you could hear people talking but you can't really understand what they were saying. That's what it sounded like to me. My eyes felt too heavy at this point so I decided to close them. The last noise I heard was Ivan's voice and background noises of the ambulance....

A/N: part 2?? Maybe?! Idk..