The Fatal Flaw | LT

XIX

November

"What do you think?" Whoa, this confidence was making me a whole new other person.

"Dancing on a table with barely anything on with your boyfriend in the crowd?!" He screamed at me.

"Whoa, last time I checked, I don't have a fucking boyfriend." I sneered, my words coming out like poison.

"So you're breaking up with me?"

"You tell me. I have been dragging your ass off every damn club of this bloody city almost every night for the past fucking month!" I screamed at him, we were now on the street but no one was fazed by what was happening in front of them. It was either they were too drunk or they simply do not care.

"I'm tired okay? I'm tired of pulling you out of the bar almost every night because you were too drunk. I'm tired of you throwing comments on how I'm putting you on a damn leash when I was just worried on how you would get home. I'm tired of seeing you with another girl almost every night, dreading to know what you were doing before I came in. I'm tired of you brushing off what happened every morning and just kissing me like nothing happened. I'm just simply tired." I let out a huge sigh.

"I'm sorry."

"You say that every morning. When's sorry going to cut it? I honestly don't fucking know why people throw it around like nothing. You say sorry for things you don't mean to do or things you fucking regret doing. But being drunk every night, throwing harsh comments to your girlfriend and having another girl in your arms for every fucking night of this past fucking month, is that something you don't intend to do? Is something possessing you every night?" I laughed with no humor at my last statement, still walking towards nowhere.

"I'm scared okay?" He whispered, the words barely spoken as I had to strain my ears to hear it.

"Scared of what?"

"You! You leaving me once I get too attached! After you meeting my sister, I got scared on how we were going too fast. I was scared on how I was going to get attached to you way too fucking fast then you'll leave me once I'm in too deep. I'm scared that you'll realize you deserve better then leave me!" He confessed, his words leaving his lips and on to the cold air. I stopped momentarily to face him.

"Scared? You told me yourself, you want to take the leap. You have to trust me that I'm not going to hurt you or leave you soon. Do you honestly think that what you've been doing for the past month will get me to stay? Because it's not, it's making me want to get out of this relationship before I'm ruined. I shot down every bad statement they were saying against you because I knew you're just having a rough time because of what happened two years ago. But guess what?! I am not Eleanor and I will never be!"

"I knew it was a matter of time before you realize I'm not worth it and then leave me. I'm trying to push you and myself away before I'm into deep. I'm falling for you and it scares me knowing you could drop me any second." He confessed, stepping closer to me.

"You cannot possibly blame me for this." I shake my head trying to shake off the tears that were threatening to come out, I am holding my ground.

"I am not."

"Well then what? You should've sorted out your feelings before kissing me. You should've dealt with whatever's going on in your head before taking me out on a date. You should've thought of this before you asked me to be your girlfriend." I closed my eyes and let out a huff. "I'm falling for you too and if you think that it doesn't scare me, then you're fucking out of your mind. I can't believe after all these weeks that I have been dragging you out of the fucking club that my feelings for you still haven't changed."