Everything I Never Asked For

Chapter 25

NIALL'S POV

My eyes sting but it doesn't compare to the aching inside my chest. Sharp pinches attack every minute inch of my body. I should be numb but my anger is thawing my freezing nerves.

I'm desperate, shameful, foolish.

I let myself float in the lake water for too long. Anything to be away from everyone. Today was the last night and it was decided my "prank" was the weakest, so here I am in nothing but my bare skin in the middle of a steady lake.

It wasn't a prank. It wasn't supposed to be. But the way Alex raged toward us, I didn't know how to react. I wasn't ready to face the consequences of my father knowing, he might even still tell him. I don't know. I'm so stupid.

I had her, I finally got her. I was seconds away from tasting her tempting lips. Everything I asked for was on it's way to happening but I had to ruin it.

I'm too aware of her pain and I can't live with myself knowing I drilled a gaping hole straight through her. How could anyone cause her so much suffering? How could I?

I told her she could trust me and I let her down so soon. So soon Niall. What the fuck is wrong with you? I want to know if she's okay. I want to know if she understands. I want to nuzzle my head in her neck, caress her soft brown hair, cuddle her, rub her cold palm, and apologize. But I know Jade too well. It'll never be enough. I threw my chance out the window and it tumbled through a sewage hole. Lost.

Tiny bubbles escape from my nostrils.

It's time to hit the surface. But if i had the balls not to, I never would.

JADE'S POV

"Well well well! Look who we have here! Back from the dead I suppose?" Luke's cheerfulness fills the air but doesn't reach me.

The fact that Niall took the secret of my parents and shoved it back in my face tortures me even though I try to push it away. That information was meant for someone who deserved it, how could I have been so naive. I need to remember that Luke is the only guy I can trust. I'm safe that way.

If there's one thing Niall was good for, he taught me that I need to accept some terms.

My parents. Gone. Niall. Gone. End of story. Move on.

"What's been going on?" I talk to Luke as I venture around my room, unpacking my bag from camping. We arrived home about an hour ago.

"Well, for one, Michael's hair is red." Michael jumps in front of the camera with his duck face on, trying too hard to look adorable. "Calum got a blonde streak...um.." Luke spins around in his seat, tapping his temple like he's thinking, with Ashton sitting joyously on his lap like a child. I look closely at him and realize something different.

"Luke Robert Hemmings, did you get a lip ring?!" I drop my pile of shirts and put my hands on my hips as my jaw drops. He throws his hand over his lip and tries to hide behind ashton like he suspects I could reach my arms through the computer screen and punch him.

"Luke has a wittle girlfriend." Ashton teases. "He's trying to impress her. He thinks he's badass with a lip ring." He squeezes Luke's cheeks playfully and then taps the tip of his nose. Luke wrinkles his nose and clenches his jaw at Ashton.

Luke has a girlfriend? The pang in my chest is more severe. The universe around me drains. I feel my flesh drooping, peeling, leaking into a sickening puddle of anxiety. I thought I left all my stupid emotions at Shasta Lake. I thought I'd never feel this way again.

After Niall last night I didn't think things could get worse. I avoided Niall all night and morning to prevent that from happening but I never anticipated this.