What If?// WDW BxB: Corbyn-Shots

Useless (Part Two): Why Don't We- Fluff

Summary: Jonah had always wanted them, all of them, all of their attention, their love, but not like this, never like this

Jonah's POV
So many things had changed in the weeks following my confession.

There were more looks softened with worry. More tiptoeing and biting tongues. More declarations, more promises, more whispered words.

More of them.

Maybe it was selfish, but I preened under their careful attention. Adoring every gentle look and late night. I finally had them the way I had always wanted them, close and completely.

There was something intoxicating about how easily I could pull Corbyn away from one of his late night Google deep dives about varying phenomena to me.

The way Zach would pause during one of his childish antics to nuzzle up against my side at the simple call of his name.

The way Daniel would sigh with a smile when I found him up late with his piano. Moving it aside without a word so my head could rest there.

The way Jack would slow each kick so I could keep up. The soft scrape of his skateboard wheels filling the otherwise empty air.

The way their very worlds seemed to stop when I made it clear I needed them.

It was incredible, it was all I had ever hoped for and yet, I still wanted more.

I wanted the soft kisses passed between Corbyn and Jack during our movie nights.

I wanted the easy touches of Daniel and Zach when they were at an arm's length.

I wanted the seemingly endless need to be close to Jack that Corbyn had. The constant will to be pressed up against his side.

I wanted the helpless looks Zach gave Daniel when his cheeks were at their reddest.

And more than anything, I wanted the sense of normality that caused these. I wanted them without asking. Without the exasperated smiles with fond eyes. Without the sighs of defeat and forced acceptance.

But, I knew there was more to their looks and touchs and kisses than that. That there was something much deeper, much stronger there that I was missing.

Corbyn yawned, shifting from where he was on my chest, hugging tighter at me, mumbling something low in his sleeply haze.

I reached down to stroke my fingers through his hair, he leaned into my touch with a drowsy smile.

I tipped my head down, brushing my nose along his forehead. He mumbled out again, tipping up into me. He was close enough now that I could make out that he was cooing.

" Jack," he breathed and my heart ached.

There it was, the element I was so desperately missing. The element that led to the helpless longing that led to those sweet touchs and soft kisses.

I leaned into him, softly pressing my mouth to his.

He hummed, pushing against me gently with a smile on his face and candy pink cheeks.

But it wasn't me he hummed for, smiled for.

And I knew that. I knew that deep down, no matter how many times they came to my aid, that it wasn't the same.

That the looks and touchs and occasional kisses we shared didn't come from the same place, didn't have the same meaning.

But that had never stopped my heart from aching for them, hoping for them, because if I could long for Corbyn, for Daniel, the same way Jack and Zach did. Then what stopped them from longing for me?