Iron Boy [Peter Parker x Male Reader]

Chapter Six

I had been in the passenger seat of Tony's car for about a half an hour. It was early Saturday morning, and he was headed towards the school for my Saturday detention. He pulled up to the school and threw it in park. He turned to me.
"This better be the last time I wake up at six o'clock to take you to detention." he said.
"What about next Saturday?"
"...I have to take you next week too...?"
"Yes...?"
"You can expect Pepper next week. Now get out of my car."
I rolled my eyes with a smirk and stepped out onto the sidewalk. There weren't many people outside. And those who were, were either in business attire headed to work, or on a run.
Tony's car zoomed out of the parking lot and sped down the street.
I walked up the stairs and into the entryway. I walked over to the detention classroom. Mr. Buterr was in there at the desk. I was the only one.
"Ah, Mr. Stark. I always enjoy seeing you..." he mocked. "Take a seat. I'll be supervising you today."
I sighed and sat down in the back.
"Ah, ah." he tapped a desk in the front with his pointer finger.
I sighed and blew air out of my mouth, in an exasperated gesture. I slid out of my seat, and sat in the seat he tapped on.
He leaned across to me.
"I don't like you, Stark. And it's not your father. Or your actions. It's your attitude. It's negative. Annoyed. Dry. Makes me sick."
I leaned on my forearms on the desk and got close to his face. I smiled.
"That explains the breath..." I said.
"There it is. The Stark charm. The plague that makes this school worse as a whole."
"This school hasn't done anything but get better from the moment I walked in those doors..."
"You make me sick..."
"You should get checked out. It must be going to your head. You're starting to repeat yourself..." I smiled bigger.
"God, it's a wonder you're still enrolled here..."
"Everyone loves me but you, I don't see the issue..."
"Ha! You wish."
"You're just mad at me cause I set up a beach in your room, and made fun of you, and broke your son's nose, and pantsed him...Y'know you should really make sure he has clean undies from now on..."
He spit in my face then backed away from me.
I wiped it off with my ring finger.
"You're a nice guy, Mr. Buterr. But that seemed a little too intimate to be professional. And frankly I don't think of you that way..." I smirked.
"I hope you burn in hell."
"I've been there. I have to say I enjoy the Man's company much more than yours..."
"Can you ever have a normal conversation, without being sassy or sarcastic?" I watched his moustache go up and down.
"Sir, you've got something in your moustache.
He raised his hand and started to feel around.
"It's wrinkly, and ugly, and sausage-like, roundish, but old..."
He took his hand away and looked at his fingers, then sighed.
He slid a sheet full of really advanced math questions.
"You don't get to leave until everyone of them is done and correct."
I stood up and he quickly walked up to me. Shoving a finger in my chest.
"Where do you think you're going?"
I grabbed a pen out of his shirt pocket, then kissed it, bounced it off his big nose, then sat down, while uncapping it.
He sighed again, louder. Then sat down.
I started on the math sheet. Most of them I had handled, but I used Smoak to make some of them go even faster. I was done in exactly seven minutes and 36 seconds.
"Done. Can I leave now?"
Mr. Buterr came over and snatched my paper, before sliding a packet in front of me. Science this time. He grabbed his glasses and started reading the math one.
I put my chin and my hand and smiled at him while swinging my legs.
"Is it right, Mr. Buterr?" I said, smugly.
He looked at me over his glasses, then sighed, crumpled the paper, and threw it away.
"That's a waste of paper, sir. I might have to write you up for that. That's a grade B offense against nature."
      "Keep talking, Stark. I can print out worksheets all day."
      I got to work on the science packet worksheet. Within five minutes I was done. I slid it across my desk towards him, loud enough for him to hear. He picked it up and began to read.
      "Number twenty three was especially difficult..." I said, tempting.
      He looked at me then flipped pages to the question I spoke of. He frowned, then chuckled slightly, but not amused. He slammed it on the desk. And pointed at it.
      "Really?"
      I looked at the picture I had drawn, consisting of a crude doodle of Mr. Buterr, along with an inappropriate body part.
      "If you think Mrs. Washington won't see this, then you are out of your mind."
      Lucky for me, I had a back up plan.
      I clicked the button on the side of my glasses, inconspicuously.
      His computer started making noise and bringing up pop-up ads. I snatched the paper then threw it in the paper shredder. Which shredded it into tiny squares. I sat back down and casually kicked my feet onto the desk.
      When he finally got the virus to die down, he turns to me.
      He looks to wear the packet had been.
      "Where is it?"
      "Where's what?"
      He growled.
      Then launched into a very long rant. I on the other hand, was playing solitaire on my glasses. Every so once and a while nodding, pretending to agree. This went on for and hour or so.
      Then he pushed my legs off my desk and I snapped back to reality. The solitaire disappeared.
      "Are you even listening to what I am saying!"
      "Yes, sir. Totally." I said with a salute.
      "What was my main point?"
      "How you and your wife have been arguing more and more and you were thinking about divorce?"
      He grabbed me by the arm and started to drag me towards the door.
      "Wait! Wait! Wait!" I said.
      He stopped and looked at me expectantly. He arched an eyebrow.
      I made a grunt and farted.
      "Okay, I'm good to go."
      He growled again and dragged me down the hallway.
      My dad was standing just outside the office, and Francis walked out and started walking towards us. She would be coming to get me, if I hadn't already been dragged out.
      "This little shit needs to talk to Mrs. Washington before h-"
      "Hey! Let go of my son, right now." My dad said, seeing Mr. Buterr drag me down the hallway.
      Mr. Buterr flushed and let go of me, dusting off my shoulder, and pretending to smooth my shirt.
      "Stop, S- Stop that. That. Stop doing that. Stop touching." Tony stuttered as Mr. Buterr tried to make himself look better.
      I slapped away his hand when he didn't stop.
      "...sorry..." he grumbled.
      "What's going on here?" Mrs. Washington said, walking out of the office.
      Francis starts to speak, but my dad cuts her off.
      "I come to pick my son up, and see this man forcefully dragging him down the hallway." Tony said.
      "I was ta-" Mr. Buterr started.
      "Then, I tell him to stop touching him, and he won't stop touching my kid, doing what, dusting him off?"
      No one spoke.
      "I see why my kid acts out here and there now, if this is how you treat kids. Dragging them to the office, like prisoners. This doesn't explain the things he did, but it gives reason to some of it." Tony snapped."
      "I'm sure Mr. Buterr didn't mean any harm, Mr. Sta-" Mrs. Washington started, but Tony cut her off again.
      "Yeah, cause that's what it looked like, ask the receptionist. Or check the cameras, that are everywhere in this place," Tony said gesturing to the ceiling. "Come on, Y/N. Let's go." he said walking towards the doors.
      "Here's your detention slip for next Saturday, Y/N." Mrs. Washington said.
      Tony stopped walking.
      I looked to it.
      "I don't like when people hand me things." I said matter-of-factly.
      "Doesn't matter. My child won't be attending." Tony said resuming his walk to the doors.
      I was about to say something to Mrs. Washington, but decided against it. I tossed a wink to Mr. Buterr over my shoulder.
      Tony was already getting in the car when I stepped outside, I quickly made my way around the car and into the passenger seat.
      "I was being an asshole..." I mumbled.
      "That doesn't matter. I don't wanna see someone handling my son like that."
      It was silent for awhile.
      Then Tony started driving.
      "You don't like when people hand you things?" Tony asked, stealing a glance at me.
      "Nah. One of my peeves." I said shaking my head.
      "...Me too." he said, still looking at the road.
      I could see his eyes through the side of his usual sunglasses, they were deep in thought.
      A few minutes later a smile appeared on his face and we turned away from the road that led to the base and further into New York. He pulled over and we got out. He locked the doors.
      "Where are we going?" I said smiling at the smile on his face.
      He pointed at a hot dog stand.
      I chuckled as we walked up to it.
      "Uh...we'll take four cheese burgers, two churros, two chocolate bars, and two extra large slushies. Both with all the red dye number five you can find." He smiled, sliding a hundred dollar bill across the counter.
      It was much more than the price, but he didn't care.
      My eyebrows raised.
      He noticed me.
      "C'mon...if you are actually my son, all this food will be gone within ten minutes..."
      I smiled while nodding.
      "That's what I thought."
      He grabbed the food from the man and handed me my share. We ate it as we walked down the street. We shared jokes back and forth causing us both to laugh uncontrollably. Eventually we just kept laughing for no reason. We were stumbling down the street and giggling as if we were two drunk teenagers.
      We had finished all the food except our slushies.  Mine was still half full, but he had finished about 3/4 of his his.
      "C'mon this way." he said, his smile wearing off on his voice.
      He led me down another street.
      "Where are we going?" I giggled out.
      "This cool museum I like to go to sometimes."
      I nodded, taking a sip of my slushie.
      He led us down many streets before we were standing in front of a huge building.
      "You were talking about the Met?" I said giggling even more. "I thought you just meant some random museum!"
      He shrugged smiling at me, then we walked up the stairs.
      The woman at the entrance stopped us immediately.
      "Excuse me, gentlemen, you can't have those in here." she pointed to our slushies.
      "Oh, no. You can't take away our slushies..." Tony whisper-yelled.
      "Are you two drunk?"
      We looked at each other then broke out laughing.
      "No, we're not drunk..." I said wiping my eyes.
      "I'd hate to see you when you were..." she mumbled. "You can't proceed farther into the museum, unless you get rid of them."
      "Why?" Tony said raising his arms up.
      Some of the slushy sloshed off the side and plopped onto the floor. The woman facepalmed.
      Tony looked down at it, then turned in a circle as if looking for someone.
      "Excuse me! Can we get a clean up in aisle nine!" he called.
      I started laughing and I ended up leaning on Tony's shoulder for support. My mouth was still full of slushy and it started dripping out the sides, onto the floor, as I laughed. Tony pointed at me and laughed even more he started taking selfies with me trying to stop him.
      "Can I get security at the entrance?" the woman whispered into her earpiece.
      That made us laugh even more.
      Security came a moment later and picked us up carrying us outside and took us down the stairs.
      They plopped us down at the bottom.
      "Take the stick out of your butt!" Tony yelled.
      I started laughing again, "Well, I'll tell you one thing: that museum was amazing!" I said, breaking into laughs near the end.
      Tony leaned on me for support this time, I wasn't expecting it we almost toppled over, making us laugh more.
      We started to walk down the streets occasionally stopping in shops, the ones that didn't kick us out.
      Two hours later we found our way back to the car and Tony put the roof down. We started blaring music and singing along, ignoring the insults from pedestrians.
      When we pulled up the music was on max volume and my seat was shaking. We staggered to the doors shopping bags up our arms, our slushies now refilled. We opened the door and ran into each other trying to walk through at the same time. We pointed at each other and started laughing.
      We turned and saw Pepper standing there, along with Cap and Peter started to walk up to us, as he heard the commotion. Soon, several other Avengers had shown up, wondering what was going on.
      "What did I call an emergency Avengers meeting?" Tony said, looking around.
      "You might as well of called a press meeting. Do you know how many pictures there are of you getting carried out of the Met? Both of you."
      "Are you two drunk?" Steve said.
      "No!" we both said simultaneously.
      "Then what's that smell?" Bruce said.
      "Oh there was this puddle of sewage water, and we weren't paying attention, and Y/N here, fell right in." he said laughing harder as he thought about it, me as well.
      "You guys are unbelievable..." Nat said.
      "We're supposed to be keeping him out of trouble..." Peter said.
      "Which one?" Vision asked.
      "Both." Pepper said.
      "C'mon. You guys are such buzzkills..." I said.
      "Seconded." Tony said raising his hand, dropping his slushy in the process.
      Everyone watched as it hit the ground and slowly pooled out across the white floor.
      Everyone silenced and stared at us.
      I was the only one that spoke:
      "Clean up in aisle nine...?"