I'm going slightly mad // Hardzello

Chapter 67

Make sure you read the chapter I uploaded yesterday before you are going to read this one!

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"Can I have his birthday as a conformation?" The doctor asks while looking at his file again. Gwil turns his head to the side for Ben to give the answer.
"21st of September 1983," Ben says without thinking twice about it.
"Good, just a quick check that we are here for the same person." The doctor smiles but his face drops as soon as he sees the two serious faces in front of him.
"So, Joe here is a coma. Right now nurses are doing everything they can to see why he got into a coma. Police officers are still talking with euhm Eve en Lucy to figure out what exactly caused him to get unconscious." Ben interrupts the doctor from saying more by starting to talk: "Antihistamines." Gwil looks at Ben with a raised eyebrow.
"What did you say?" The doctor says.
"Antihistamines. I already told the police that. They need to check on antihistamines. He used it on me before." Ben says while focussing his gaze on the doctor.
"Okay, I am going to tell them right now. If you both can stay here?" Gwil nods while the doctor runs out of the room.

"What is it?" Gwil asks. His mind is racing with questions.
"It's a sleep medicine." Ben simply says. His mind is bringing more and more flashbacks back from everything that happened when he was younger.
"Have you ever had professional help for this Ben?" Gwil wants to grab Ben's wrist to get his attention but Ben immediately flinches before yanking his arm away.
"For what?" He asks while turning his head away from Gwil.
"For everything your dad did. It's clearly still bothering you. From little flashbacks to nightmares. There are people who can professionally help you." Gwil tries to make eye contact with Ben, but the latter keeps his head turned away from Gwil.
"It's not necessary," Ben says. He knows that it's not true. He knows it. He knows it, but he doesn't want to admit it.
"There is nothing wrong with looking for help. They won't judge you. Their job is to help you. Nobody has to know. Does it help you if I say that I've had help too? Right after my parents got out of jail they looked for external help for me."
"Whatever, it's not important anymore. Joe is dying and it's because of me." Ben says. He doesn't even try to stay strong. Tears start streaming down his face. For a few seconds, Gwil is completely lost in the situation.

"Hey pretty boy, come here." Gwil pets on his lap. Ben wants to object but he is too deep in his own thoughts that he doesn't even try. He walks over before sitting down onto Gwil's lap.
"It's okay, Ben. Let it all out." Gwil says while he wraps his arms around Ben. The latter crooks his head in Gwil's neck.
"I don't want him to die, Gwil. I have nothing left in my life. My family left me. The only reason I am where I am today is because he came into my life. I can't lose him." Ben needs to stop a few times through his sentence because the stream of tears is getting worse.
"Sssh. Take a few deep breaths for me." Gwil places his hand on Ben's stomach to make sure he follows Gwil's instructions. He feels Ben's chest rise and falls at the same pace he does.
"Okay, now look at me." Ben looks up although he doesn't see anything through the haze of tears.
"You have to remain strong Ben. Joe needs you to be there for him when he wakes up. If he still has the memories from what happened he might have some serious traumas. You need to be there to help him, but you will not be able to if you don't get yourself on the right track first. If Joe was here right now he would agree with me and say that you need to look for help. Not only with your childhood things but also of everything that happened with Joe. Don't forget that Joe was the one that pushed Rami to get help." Gwil says before using the sleeve from his shirt to wipe Ben's wet face. Ben keeps looking at him without saying anything. Gwil doubts if he even heard a word of what he just said.
"Do it for Joe?" He finally asks. Ben keeps looking at him with a blank expression. It almost scares Gwil. It feels like the bloodshot eyes that are starring at him look straight into his soul.
"Okay," Ben says after a few moments before looking down at the ground again.

The doctor walks in. He smiles at the two before sitting down at his chair.
"Needed some comfort?" He directs his question to Ben.
"Yeah, I'm sorry," Ben says. He gets of Gwil's lap immediately to sit down into his own chair again.
"I told the nurses to look for any sleep medicine or other forms of drugs. They will bring the main results here as soon as possible." Ben nods. He has taken drugs tests before. The way of testing is nothing new for him.
"I looked in the results from the tests they already did. From that, I can't tell you anything about the seriousness of the coma. It's hard to say if he is going to wake up from it. I can't give you any time boundaries either. For now, we just have to wait and hope that he is going to be alright." The doctor says.
"Can I see him?" Ben asks.
"Right now you can't. You have to wait until they are done with the tests. After that, you are welcome to sit next to his bed." The doctor says.

After the doctor gave them a whole rant of information they are free to go. They took place into the living room again.
"Visitors of Joseph Mazzello?" Ben immediately jumps up when he hears Joe's name.
"Ben, I'll stay here. It's best if you go alone. I will be here when you need me. Just call me, okay?" Gwil says. Ben turns around to nod before walking after the nurse. Once he is out of sight tears start streaming down Gwil's face. He knows that he needs to remain strong in order to help Ben, but now that he is alone he can't keep it all in. When he takes his phone out he sees a lot of missed calls and texts from Eve as well as one text from Rami. He decides to text Eve first.

Sorry for not responding sweetheart. I see that you got dropped of home. You should get some rest. I can't leave yet. Rami left too and Ben is in such a bad mental state that I can't possibly leave him alone.

Gwil sends the text before opening his chat with Rami.

Sorry, I couldn't take it anymore.

Gwil reads the sentence over and over again.

None, of us can. Yet, I'm still here.

Gwil types the message without even thinking. He sends it before putting his phone in his pocket again. The tears are streaming down his face. He buries his head in his hands before he hears footsteps walking his way. 

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Hey guys,

I know I only uploaded yesterday morning. I just need the comments y'all leave under these chapters to cheer me up a bit. I had this chapter already edited, so I might as well upload it. 

Take good care of yourselves guys.

Goodbye,

Xx Itsametaphorjoe