Call It What You Want: Home Series 1 (Trans!Steve and Pan!Bucky Summer AU)

Sixty-Two

Steve had been dreading this day from the moment he met Natasha's family. Sure, he might not have been too keen on joining her in the beginning. But once he got there and met everyone, it changed. As it often did. As Steve should've known it would.

For the last time, Steve laid there in the guest bed next to Natasha. Over their time at the house, it didn't feel much like a guest bed or a guestroom. It felt like theirs. Especially since the bedding smelled like cigarettes and Natasha's floral body spray mixed with Steve's unscented body lotion.

As Steve laid there, looking at the window with the thin curtains and beautiful flowers growing outside, Natasha rolled over. Cuddling close to him, Natasha rested her forehead against Steve's back and rasped, "You awake?"

"Duh," Steve mocked, sniffling.

"It'll be okay," Natasha held Steve just a bit tighter and consoled her best friend, "It doesn't have to be goodbye."

"Right," Steve sarcastically agreed to the empty promise.

"Hey," Natasha complained, nudging his shoulder as she suggested, "We live in the day of technology."

Swallowing thickly, Steve confirmed, "I know."

"I mean it," she whispered and repeated, "It doesn't have to be goodbye."

And despite no tears falling from his eyes, Steve sniffled again. Maybe all his tears had dried up. Maybe his heart believed Natasha and held the tears back. Whatever it was, no tears fell from his eyes.

Which was probably a good thing.

Staying in bed for only a moment longer, Steve slipped out of bed and got around for the day. Avoiding his reflection in the mirror over the sink as he brushed his teeth. Finger combing through his floppy blond hair. Choosing comfortable clothes for the plane ride. Trying to keep his heart together the best he could.

Of course, once he exited the guestroom, he realized that his heart was going to shatter whether he wanted it to or not. Especially when everything seemed so normal. Mandy and Becca were fighting over the remote. Sam was sitting on the sofa with Tibby on the floor in front of him as he expertly braided her hair. In the kitchen, Darlene and Winifred were making breakfast, causing everything to smell like pancake heaven.

From the corner of his eye, Steve spotted Bucky leaving his and Sam's room. Looking over at him, Steve knew that Bucky was his person. Without a single doubt, Bucky was it. No matter what happened. No matter who he met. No matter who he dated, if he chose to. Bucky was his once in a life time.

When Bucky smiled, Steve could feel that he was Bucky's person too.

It doesn't have to be goodbye, Steve internally mused, giving Bucky a smile too.

That became Steve's mantra for the rest of the day. As they scarfed down the blueberry pancakes, and Tibby flashed him a syrupy smile. It doesn't have to be goodbye. As they relaxed in the living room, watching some TV as the clock counted down until they had to leave. Bucky's arm wrapped around Steve's shoulders and Steve's head on Bucky's chest. It doesn't have to be goodbye. It doesn't have to be goodbye.

One by one, the Barnes' family gave Steve and Natasha hugs. Almost all of them teary eyed and tight embraces. Almost like no one wanted Steve and Natasha to leave. Least of all, Natasha and Steve.

As they stood outside on the front porch, Steve let go of Sam. Playfully, Sam ruffled Steve's hair and told him, "Keep an eye on Killer."

"I punch one guy and now I'll never hear the end of it," Natasha teasingly complained before hugging her cousin.

"Yeah, and you broke his nose," Mandy clarified, hugging Steve next.

Pulling away from one Barnes to hug the next. Steve crouched down and pulled Tibby in for a hug. He'd be able to hug his own baby sibling soon, but that didn't mean he wouldn't miss the little sister he never had and immediately knew he needed. Tibby held tightly around Steve's neck and stained his light blue tee with her tears, and Steve held her back just as tight.

Of course, he didn't hold her nearly as tight as Natasha held Tibby. Natasha scooped her small frame up in her arms and held her closer than anyone expected. Steve knew right then that this trip was exactly what Natasha had needed.

"Okay," Bucky announced, carrying both packed bags out of the house. Purposely avoiding Steve's gaze as he carried the bags out to the Barnes' white VW Jetta.

Seeing the redness around Bucky's eyes, Steve tried not to take it too personally. After all, he was having enough difficulty of his own. So, Steve reminded himself, It doesn't have to be goodbye.

Bucky hid a sniffle by closing the trunk door. Tapping the top of the car, he cleared his throat and suggested, "We should get going."

"You better all keep me posted in the family group chat," Natasha warned, pointing accusatorily at her family on the porch.

"Duh," Becca scoffed while Sam teasingly questioned, "Who do you think we are?!"

"Make sure to send pictures of the goats!" Steve called, climbing into the passenger seat.

"Duh," Tibby copied, feeling proud of herself. Especially when Mandy wrapped her arms around her tiny frame.

Natasha placed her hand over her heart and said, "They grow up so fast."

"Make sure to give your dad hell," Darlene encouraged while Winifred told them, "Be good!"

They nodded, Steve figuring that he could be good enough for both of them while Natasha continued to make Ivan's life a nightmare. Deciding that Ivan deserved it. Just a bit. Or a lot.

As Bucky started pulling down the driveway, Steve watched the family out of the side mirror. A sad smile on his face as he watched them wave and reached his own arm out of the window to wave back. It doesn't have to be goodbye.