Perrie: The puzzle box said "4-7 years", but I solved it in an hour
Camila: (sighs) I'm dating an idiot
——— Ally: What color are mirrors?
Dinah: Can a crip donate blood?
Camila: Can a teacher give a homeless kid homework?
Leigh: If I weighed 99 pounds and ate a pound of nachos, then I'd be 1% nacho
Perrie: What does water tastes like?
Jade: How do you describe a color to a blind person?
Jesy: Do they celebrate Thanksgiving in Turkey?
Normani: CARRY YALL ASSES TO SLEEP
——— *Fetus Mix*
Jade: Ooh, let's call ourselves "Infinite Bass"
Girls: Yeah!
(Later after googling the name)
Leigh:...
Perrie:...
Jade:...
Jesy: All in favor for "Little Mix", say "Aye"
Girls: Aye
(If yk, yk)
——— Jade: When I was 6, Santa gave me coal for Christmas. The next year, I decided to get back at him and poison the cookies I left out...
Lauren: And?
Jade: The bloody bastard somehow found out and killed me dad
——— *at the amusement park*
Ally: That was so fun!
Jesy: What should we ride next?
Leigh: Something that'll actually make me scream...
Jade: (raises hand) My face?
Ally:...
Leigh:...
Jesy:...
Jade:...
Jade: 🌚
——— *Camren, after watching The Stripper on YouTube*
Camila:...
Lauren:...
Camila: Can we burst the fans' bubbles now and say that Camesy and Laurade is real?
Lauren: Are you crazy?! I wanna know if I really did find out that you're Karla or if it's just a dream!
Camila: (facepalms)
(If you've read The Stripper then you know what's up. Also, yes, they made it into a series... go check that shit out if you didn't already... after you read this of course)
——— No one:
Not a damn soul:
Like seriously, no fucking body:
Jade, in the OIBM vertical video:
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——— *Interview*
Dinah: And then she said "Mani can do tricks with her ass" and Mani hit that shit and topped it with a split that would've hurt my pussy. Then Mila comes out from west bubbafuck wearin' a damn cowboy outfit, asking for sugar cubes then Perrie comes out dressed like a horse. In the mist of it all, Jade's under the table eating Leigh out, Jesy's letting Ally cop a feel, Lauren is on her phone, and I'm just like "Goddamn, I want her to sit on my face."
Interviewer:...
Dinah: Oh, my bad. What was the question?
Interviewer: 'Do you like sports?'
Dinah: Oh... yeah, if you count juggling Mani's tits in my mouth
Interviewer: (faints)
———
Camila: (sings) You'll believe god is a woman
Jade: (bust through the door wearing sunglasses and a shirt of her wearing sunglasses) And her name is Jade Thirlwall
——— Lauren: (sings) A tornado flew around my room-
Leigh: What the fuck?! You're singing it wrong! It's a potato flew around my-
Lauren: (plucks her) No *pluck* no *pluck* no
——— No one:
Not a fucking soul:
Not even god:
Hell, not even Satan:
Jesy: BaLeGdAh
——— *Cade, Alesy, Laurrie, and Leimani*
(Notice plays)
Camila: (gets pregnant)
Lauren: (gets pregnant)
Normani: (gets pregnant)
Jesy: (gets pregnant with twins)
(Okay, but seriously, Jesy's vocals were extra sexy in that song... like all of their voices were total eargasms... like I'm pregnant)
