Letters to a Rockstar

Watching

This will be a tear jerker. This will be told from Chelsea's point of view up in Heaven.

I leaned back from my house that overlooked the earth. I laid back in my cloud and sighed a deep, painful sigh.

I closed my eyes as tears fell from my eyes. I got up and walked down the steps towards the outlook. I climbed the stairs and laid down on a lounger and looked over the entire planet. I grabbed a telescope and dialed in my last name and it zoomed over to my family.

I set it up on a stand as the thing expanded and got to be the size of a tractor tire. I waived my arms and clouds covered my area. I leaned against cushions and propped the circle up and looked.

My husband was playing with my twin sons in the backyard. He was teaching them how to roll a ball. They were sitting in the laps of Andrew and CC. He gently rolled a ball towards Patrick and he giggled as he grabbed it and bit at it. He was teething. I chuckled lightly at this. Ashley rolled another ball towards Ashton. He watched it roll towards him and clapped his hands. He grabbed it and chewed on it. My husband laughed as he watched them.

They became fussy and he saw Andy and CC pick them up and try to comfort my sons. I then saw a female figure come walking over to them and I zoomed closer.

It was Juliet. She took Patrick and checked his diaper. She smirked as she carried him inside. CC handed Ashton back and shook his head. I watched them all go back inside our house.

They got changed and Ashley made Ashton a bottle. I watched his eyes fill with tears when he spotted the picture of the ultrasound picture of the twins. I had framed it the day I found out and had it set up where it is now.

Ashley came home and went about his evening and he spotted it. He screamed and came racing into where I was. I was laying down resting my back. He grabbed my hands and sat down. I nodded and he burst into happy tears.

"I'm going to be a father to twin boys!" I recalled him yelling. I watched this memory play out on the circle in front of me. I heard his voice echo as the memory faded softly.

I then saw another memory appear. This reads memories as well. It called a memoryscope.

The pregnancy lasted the full nine months. I got through labor and delivery. It left me VERY weak and exhausted.

The twins were three months old when I got worse. My skin got yellow and I was unable to stand. I got bloodwork done and my liver was slowly giving out.

I recall looking over at my husband and he had tears falling. "How much longer?" I asked looking back at my doctor.

"3 months."

I nodded and we stood up and walked out of the room. Once we were back at home alone, I screamed at the top of my lungs and my knees gave way. I broke down on the floor inside of the entryway. Our twins were with their grandma Kropp.

"FUCK! WHY! WHY! WHY! THIS IS NOT FAIR GOD DAMNIT!" I screamed and kicked and screamed as tears burned my face. I felt my body get picked up and carried upstairs to our room. I was laid down.

I saw myself punch and kick and scream and cry. My heart was breaking all over again as I watched this memory. Ashley just stayed beside me as I cried. His eyes had tears dropping down as he watched me. He never once comforted me while I was doing this. He waited until I calmed down and he pulled me into his arms.