Letters to a Rockstar

Kaleidoscope

 Emerson later told me that he had found my letter ripped and the picture. And he lovingly taped it back up and enclosed a letter. He swore that he never read a single word. 

I was mad at first. 

He however would never ever lie to me about this kind of stuff. 

However! I knew that Ashley was just feeling sorry for me. He never ever could have fallen for ME. As much as I had wanted to believe that he was, he was just taking pity for me. Along with everyone else who has came into contact with me. 

I sighed and sat up from laying down in my bed. I looked at my watch and it was a little after 7:00 in the morning. 

I took mental note as to how I was feeling. 

Pain is coming from my back. Manageable. 

Nausea is at a 4 today. Tolerable

Fatigue is at a 0. THANK GOD!

I took my medicine and scooted over to my side of the bed and stood up and stretched. 

BIG MISTAKE!!!!

Down I went and I screamed out in pain. Less then a second later, I saw tattooed arms grab me and I screamed louder. "GOD DAMNIT! LET ME THE FUCK GO REMINGTON!" I screamed and broke down crying. 

"Emerson! Get in here.. "I am coming Rem. I heard." Emerson said racing into my room. He had a large shot and a needle and an alcohol wipe. "Hang in there sis." Remington said softly.

Emerson unbuttoned my pajama top and wiped my port. In seconds flat I felt the medicine go into my port-line. I collapsed against Remington as Emerson followed. I felt wetness on my arm and I looked up. 

Emerson had tears falling from his eyes. I closed my eyes as the medicine was given to me. 

I woke back up an hour later in my brother's arms. He had not moved us when I had fallen asleep. He was laying against some floor cushions and was watching me with sad eyes. He smiled softly at me as I rubbed my eyes. 

I sat up and immediately began to cry. 

"I hate this! I hate dying! I hate pain! No wonder Ashley Purdy has not written me back! I am not loveable." I said as I cried. 

"Hey, hey, hey. You are so brave Chelsea. We all love you so much. Ashley has not given up on you. I know the guy. He is just busy with his music. He cares about you. I don't think he would have written like he has if he did not care. You are going to beat this fucker! And come out a much stronger person. Now! Lets get you dressed. We are going to go somewhere special." He said as I cuddled into his bare chest. 

I laid there and listened to his steady heartbeat. His lungs breathing a clear, steady pattern. I felt arms wrap around me. "I will never forget this. Cuddling into your chest and hearing your heartbeat. Feeling the love pour out of you onto my broken body. I am so lucky to have you in my life. You have been the best big brother. Thank you for giving me the life and love that you have given to me." I said as tears rolled down my eyes.

He did not say a word. He just held me in his arms and we silently cried. 

I laid there and wiped my tears from my eyes and his chest. His arms never let go as we listened to the birds and the lake outside of my room. I looked up and I saw the colorful lights shine down into my room. My stained glass windows casting a soothing glow around us. I had a window with Starry Night. Another had Water Lilies. 

I rolled over onto my back as he rested his arms on my shoulders. He looked down at me and kissed my nose. Causing me to giggle softly. He smiled warmly at my giggle.