The Device by @Jbarryt
Really great start - I could picture it in my head from the very first paragraph. Especially liked the comparison with the grain of rice (hope you know what I mean.)
Grammar was en pointe - and if I did find mistakes they were tiny.
Only thing I can say is maybe break up the paragraphs a bit more for easier reading. But that's only a suggestion.
The story reminded me of a mix between the Matrix, Inception, and the Fifth Wave.
Numbers spelled out look more formal.
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Critiques 2 [CLOSED FOR CATCH UP]
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