Only If Fairytales Were True by @Wingsanddreams
There was a repetition of 'beautiful' at the beginning. Don't know if it was deliberate or not.
Comma splices can be solved with either a full stop or a semi colon.
I'll tag you in a post where I explain how to format dialogue correctly.
Questions need question marks.
Really beautiful writing though - it really fits the theme of marriage.
Colloquialism ruins the mood.
Tense jumps - keep everything in the past.
I found there were some words and phrases that could have been phrased better. Take a look at my comments.
Some typos and layout issues but they were small.
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Critiques 2 [CLOSED FOR CATCH UP]
RandomCLOSED FOR CATCH UP Want some honest, un-sugarcoated, constructive feedback? Come on in! I would love to help you out! This is my second critique book and a direct continuation. Please refer to this one instead of the old one.