Maria Maria | Oscar Diaz

37 - Not another second

I looked around at everybody after Cesar asked us about Maria. Then everyone looked at me. I was who everyone looked to in times like this. When Spooky wasn't available. I walked up to Cesar.

"Maria is in surgery compa. She, well, she started bleeding. A lot. They rushed her into emergency surgery. We're not sure what's going on with her right now."

Cesar backed up from me and shook his head. "No. No! She has to be okay. Right? My brother can't lose her. Or their baby. I, I can't..." He braced himself on the wall behind him. I walked up to him and held him up. "It's going to be okay Cesar." He shook his head and looked up at me with tears in his eyes. "Angel, Oscar can't lose her. If he does." He stopped and paused. I felt a shudder run through his body. "Angel he wouldn't have anything else to keep him grounded. I can't watch my brother go back to what he was when he first got out of prison. Angel he didn't care about shit." I nodded. "I know. I know. We're not going to let that happen. We're here for him. No matter what happens. We will not let him go back to that point." 

I pulled Cesar into a hug. I saw the tears welling in the bottom of his eyes. I held him for a while. Letting him get it out without everyone seeing. After a few minutes we broke the embrace and walked back into the waiting room. 

I watched Leana pace back and forth, Cesar pulled his phone out and started texting someone, probably Monse. Santi was biting his nails, which he does every time something has him worried. I just sat there, numb. I couldn't allow myself to succumb to my emotions right now. Everyone was going to be depending on me right now. If something happened to Maria or the baby I would have to be the one to tell Spooky. If something happened to Spooky I would have to be the one to step up and lead the Santos. 

It's crazy how things can change in an instant. One minute, we think we have things figured out and then the next minute life throws you some shit you were not in any way prepared for. 

I closed my eyes for a second and remembered the first time that I met Spooky. He was actually fighting with his dad. His dad was yelling at him as Spooky walked out of their front yard and started down the street. He bumped into me as he turned out of his yard. He didn't see me since he had his head down. I thought I was tough. So I popped off. "Watch where the fuck you're going holmes!" He didn't even say anything to me. He didn't even acknowledge me. I ran up to him and put my hand on his shoulder to make him acknowledge me but I was immediately met with the barrel of a glock staring at my face. I threw my hands up. "My bad. Damn." He shook his head. "Don't ever fucking touch me." "You bumped into me fool." He frowned and then put the gun down. "Shit, my bad." I shrugged it off. "It's cool. Uh, you okay?" He shook his head. "Nah, my old man is tripping. As usual." 

I looked around and pulled out a blunt from my pocket. "Want to smoke it out?" He looked at me and then at the blunt then shrugged his shoulders. "Sure." I lit up the blunt and we started walking down the street smoking. As we passed the blunt back and forth between each other we shared stories about our parents. I told him how my dad left me and Leana when we were really young. How my mom was doing her best to provide for us at that time. That's when he offered to put me down with the Santos. He said I could earn money with them. The next day I was jumped in. The next day after that his dad was killed. 

I've never seen him show any true emotions for any of it. He just held it in and assumed the role that was bestowed upon him. 

Nothing really got him emotional. He stayed hard. 

Until he met Maria.

She was the one person who softened the hard ass leader of the Santos. I've never seen him care for someone that much. Other than Cesar. But even with Cesar he never showed too many emotions. 

I opened my eyes and unballed my fists. My palms were stinging from where my fingernails had dug into them. I can't lose Spooky. He's my family. And he doesn't deserve to go out like this. 

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