Diary of an Introvert

52: Doubts and Affirmation

I stopped taking my Masters Degree.
And still in fear of what people will say towards me.

"It's such a waste!"
"It's just two years!"
"You should have endured more."

Yes, I can. But I won't.

I know myself more than others.
I know my limits.
I know what I can do.

I have this realization few weeks ago when I was with a friend talking about life in my fave cafe, The Coffee Farm.

Ever since, I felt like I was drawn into Guidance and Counseling, like I was meant to be there. I held on to that vision until recently. It was a good help, learning new things but along the way, it became more of an obligation than fulfulling a dream. It became tiring— draining all my energy and positivity.

I know I prayed for this to happen and the Lord paved the way for me— but why am I feeling this way? I'm unhappy.

And so I thought, maybe, He gave me the chance to experience what I wanted to have just to make me learn that He got a different plan for me.

An older friend once told me ," You know why only 0.1% of the population became successful? It's because only them got the courage to not follow the flow— of what's trending— of what people wanted them to do and achieve.

There I felt assured.
I may have became reckless but I don't regret doing it.
Later on, if this reflection of mine was actually a mistake, then I guess it's time for me to learn again.

As what I also say to my students...

"It's okay to make mistakes as long as you learn from it. It's okay to feel hurt and frustrated and tell yourself it's your fault. Yet in the end, as we learn how to forgive others, let us also forgive ourselves. Let's just try again. We can make things better next time, if not, still it's okay.

Flowers don't grow and bloom all at the same time. ❤️