The Maid For Styles

Chapter 71

Chloe's POV

Paying for a crappy room in a cheap motel, as I tried not to remember why I was there in the first place, sure that the tears I'd managed to conceal would end up falling, was possibly one of the hardest things I'd ever put myself through. The large lump in my throat blocked the passage, leaving my voice to strain itself to be heard. I was sure the man behind the counter hadn't noticed, but with each word I spoke, it was becoming increasingly harder to speak without allowing a sob to rip from my throat.

The room I'd been given was small and smelly. It was hard for me to believe that something so run down was still operating, though, when my eyes fell on the bed, my first instinct was to rush over and collapse on the possibly dirty sheets-and that's exactly what I did. My torso came in contact with the mattress as the hundredth round of tears and sobs racked my body. The pillowcase was slowly dampening as the material absorbed by tears, and underneath my weight, I could feel the bed shaking with each gut-wrenching sob that left me.

I'd always prepared myself for the day that I would feel the excruciating, heart breaking pain, triggered by the one that held my heart in the palm of their hands. And, as I sat on the disgustingly grubby motel bed, I wondered to myself; is this really it? Is this really the mind-numbing pain that I've been waiting for? My God, I couldn't tell you how hard it was to stop the physical ache that throbbed in my chest, and for the pounding in my brain to cease as my thoughts revolved around Harry and the heartbreak he'd caused me. I wasn't certain that I'd finally stumbled across the agony I'd been dreading, but if the anguish and hurt I was feeling as I curled up in a ball, sobbing relentlessly, wasn't it, then I was sure I couldn't prepare myself for the time when it finally arrived.

Harry's face flashed in my mind as his words spun around and around my head. Our fight had gone from something minimal to something absolutely devastating, and I wasn't sure how at all, really. Wether Harry had used his pent up hurt from his father on me to relieve some stress or he was truly frustrated with me, I wasn't sure-either way, I was certain he'd spoken the truth.

He didn't understand that keeping secrets from me was the thing between us that prevented the breaking of the barrier, which allowed us to be the fully fledged couple I'd always hoped we'd be. My heart and soul had always been Harry's, in which I told him my secrets and let him in on my life. It'd taken time for me to realise that letting Harry get away with all the lies and secrets that he'd kept from me was unfair and unreasonable, and that was why I'd finally snapped right in the middle of his bedroom.

The words kept flowing out of my mouth and I couldn't stop them. I let him have it and told him exactly what was affecting me, yet it was like he didn't care. The fact that he had the decency to tell me to trust him, when his trust was all I'd been yearning for all along, was appalling. I was almost embarrassed to have broken down the way I did in front of him, but again, it was all his fault, and he needed to see the damage he'd caused. Maybe it would've been like a slap in the face, shocking him, making him realise he was an asshole, and that he needed to wake up to himself.

Harry promised me he'd change and at the time I'd thought to myself that he was being ridiculous. 'There's no way he needs to change. Yes, he has some flaws, but we all do' were the words I'd told myself when he hit a low point, and wasn't proud of himself. It was only after he'd destroyed me in a matter of minutes that I realised I was truly wrong. There was nothing improper with the love that Harry promised he had for me, but the anger that swelled inside him whenever he fought was something that needed to stop. I couldn't bear walking away heartbroken after every fight-it was all getting too much for me. Dishonesty was a trait in him that I hadn't discovered until the later stages of our relationship, making me question just how truthful he'd been. If he truly wanted to change for me, I was expecting his deceitfulness to be one of the first things he improved, because that was starting to tear me apart from the inside-stressing me out to the point where I was sure my hair would fall out from being pulled too hard.