The Maid For Styles

Chapter 72

THE ONE HUNDRED VOTES THING IS LIKE A THING NOW SO YEAH

Chloe's POV

I was so sick of the tears that had made themselves too familiar over the past day. My body was tired of shaking as the sobs escaped my throat, but above all, my heart was done with the constant shattering, mending, and re-shattering that it had become accustomed to. It was all getting too much for me in my frail state to handle and I knew I was close to giving up all together. Yet, every time the possibility of leaving was thought about, my heart would get under way with the overwhelming ache it provided. That was when I realised I wasn't going anywhere without Harry.

Harry. Fuck, that name brought me a mix of emotions. One day, it may have brought the biggest smile to my face, and maybe I would've been ecstatic to talk about that man, with endless sentences that proved just how happy he made me. Unfortunately, there were days in which his name could trigger my tears and sobs, and the overwhelming pain that managed to consume me to the point where I couldn't feel anything else. Harry was almost like a hurricane; ruining the people he came across. Sometimes, he would leave a remainder, fortunately sparing a small part of them that was possible to be restored. There were the times he'd leave almost nothing, in which made it a lot harder to repair any damage. The one I had become acquainted with was when he managed to destroy and rip apart every single little bit of the once whole heart, leaving it impossible to mend and glue the pieces back together.

Nothing had prepared me for what the privilege of being Harry's would do. Being the one he held at night and whispered 'I love you' after supposedly never having used his heart before, couldn't have brought me any greater pleasure. Harry may have had a strong personality, but his heart was frail, yet nothing made me stronger than his fragile heart. Knowing his heart beat for me and provided the love he delivered, bound me together and allowed me to reciprocate all my devotion. In saying that, for me, it was also a huge problem.

Being so constant and committed to Harry set me up for a world of hurt whenever he managed to split my heart in two. The anguish that came from loving someone who could tear you to shreds within minutes was harrowing. While he was alone, with anger filling his veins, I was slowly falling apart, thinking about how he was possibly okay, and I wasn't. My bed couldn't provide me the comfort I needed when I remembered how the two of us had spent nights entangled in its sheets. Nothing in the house could glue me back together, as every surface was a reminder of the two of us. There was nowhere to go to receive the consolation I was desperately searching for. I was alone.

I was alone, even when he was still so near. I was alone even though the boys still roamed the houses rooms-their embraces only prompted the vivid flashbacks in which Harry was comforting me in such a way. Just like back at the motel in Holmes Chapel, my pillow was damp with my tears and the mattress shook as sobs racked my body. The music that blasted through my room couldn't have made me feel more like a teenager in a movie when I realised just how depressing the tunes were. I was falling to absolute pieces and I couldn't do anything about it. Only Harry could, yet he hadn't bothered to reconcile with me during the whole half a day he'd been home. Confusion clawed at my insides, desperately wanting an answer to the one question that had haunted me for hours: have we broken up? His demand for me to leave the room seemed clear enough, but when my brain didn't have anything else to think about, it came up with many possibilities. Had he wanted me to leave for the night and apologise to me the next day? Or had he wanted me to leave to only have him ignore me for as long as he wanted? Was he being really fucking literal and asking me to leave the country? It was all a big puzzle that I had to somehow put together, but it wasn't possible without Harry's aid, and I didn't know how long it was going to take until I received that from him.

I love you more than I knew,

I could ever love someone,

And got it all so deep,