Spam please
When I wake up I see josh is really close to my face. I blink and he touches my cheek. "You're really pretty," he says and I blush.
"Thank you- faggot," I say and Josh chuckles. I'm glad he's not uptight and weird about my tics. I say inappropriate things but I dont mean to. Its embarrassing.
"I like sucking dick so yeah, I am a faggot," he says and my face goes red. I've never even kissed a person.. "awe, you're blushing," he says and moves some of my hair. He puts his hand on my hip but the door bursts open.
"Did you go through my fucking shit?" The rude guy accuses josh and comes over yanking him off the bed. I sit up surprised and watch. The guy looks and sounds really pissed off. Josh looks annoyed.
"Yeah, fucker. I did," josh says pushing him away.
"Give it back dipshit," he yells. Did josh take something from him? Josh looks mad now.
"Oli, calm-"
"Oliver. Not fucking Oli," he says.
"I'm not giving it back," josh says aggravated. Oliver glares at josh and then me. He runs his hand through his now curly but oily hair.
They guy thinks about something and I see he's weighing his options. He rolls his eyes. "Whatever," he says and storms out. Josh sighs and sits next to me and leans his head on my shoulder.
"What did you take from him?" I ask and he shakes his head no. He wont tell me? I guess it's not my business but it feels like it is. That's probably just the curious side of me.
"Oh your friend said he had to go home and help his mom with something. So, you're stuck with onky me for the day and possibly over night," he says. Awsten is always by my side, how is he going to not take me? I can help his mom too.
Josh doesn't know that I need to have someone by my side 95% of the time. I'm the super clingy and get lonely super fast. Josh gets up and picks up his phone. "He didnt wake me up?" I ask and josh shakes his head. Awsten isn't supposed to leave me..
"Fuck, my sister-" he stops and starts dialing a number. "I have to go. I'll be right back," he says leaving in such a hurry I dont get the chance to tell him I cant be alone. The door shuts and I blink slowly. What? Why?
How can he just leave me? Well probably because he doesn't know that I cant be alone.. I get up and slowly go into the other room to see the oliver dude still looking pissed off. Did josh tell him about me? Does he know I have tourettes?
He's looking through his closet for something but stops when he heats me close the door. I just need to be in view of someone. Theres a possibility I pass out and stop breathing or start hitting myself. If I hit myself theres a chance he tries to stop me and that's what I need because I dont want more bruises. Bruises are ugly and hurt. The ones I have are on my thighs, ribs, and one on the side of my neck but it's harder to see.
He looks at me as I sit on his bed. This whole situation is giving me anxiety and today has been really bad with my attacks. "What the fuck do you want?" He growls at me. My mouth goes dry and I feel uncomfortable and awkward.
"No-nothing," I say trying to stay calm. I can feel it coming. My hands twitch a little. "Good morning," I say blinking hard. "Good morning, fuck me," I say trying to stay quiet. He looks at me not changing his pissed off look.
"Fuck-" I raise my voice a little and hit my thigh. Ouch. Oliver turns and watches me more.
"I'm batman!" I yell and pull my hair. "Ouchhh, stoopp," I say to myself and he starts walking over and grabs my wrist roughly and makes me stop pulling my hair.
Not on purpose (of course) I kick him with my socked foot in the shin. "S-sorry-" I click my tongue and try to not hit myself with my other hand. He grabs it and I twitch.
"Dont apologize, just try to shut up," he says and my arms clinche and jerk trying to hurt me but he has a tight grip on my wrists.
"Kill yourself," I mumble and close my eyes. Slurs and random things get yelled out of my own mouth for a while and he ends up pushing me on the bed do I'm laying and sitting on my thighs as he pins me down.
"I dont feel like being kicked," he says because I've kicked him at least 4 times before he got in this position. Time seems slower when I have these attacks but after a while I stop jerking around and yelling so he let's go of me and gets off.
"Thank you.." I say and he rolls his eyes.
"Whatever," he says and looks through his draws. He helped me but he is rude..
"Josh said something about his sister, does she go here?" I ask because I want to know how long he will be gone for.
"She lives 30 minutes away," he says and then puts something that was in his drawer in his mouth and swallows it. Was it a pill? For what? He looks at his phone and then at me. "So you are in here beside you have tourettes and are experiencing me to help you?" He says and I shrug. Yes but he makes it sound selfish.
He sighs and grabs a water bottle and drinks some. "I just don't want to hurt myself," I whisper feeling guilty.
He sits on the floor and looks at the ceiling. He gives off a weird feeling.. "are you okay?" I ask and he looks over blankly.
"Uh huh, fine and dandy," he says and smirks. He lays on the floor and after ten minutes he looks out of it.
"Oliver?" I ask after a bark. He looks over slowly. "What did you take?" I ask and he smiles with no meaning behind it.
"Xanax," he says and I feel weird. Xanax is addictive and bad for you. The door opens and josh comes in and frowns a Oliver. Does josh know he's high off xanax?
Josh steps over him and I get up and follow him to our room. "Sorry, my sister broke her leg so I drove her to the hospital. Her boyfriend will get her and stuff so I'm of no use," he says and I nod.
I want to tell him to never leave me alone again but I dont want to sound like a bitch so I stay quiet. Everything gets fuzzy so I rush to my bed. "Hold on," I say and fall onto my bed as I lose consciousness.
Words: 1182
Thoughts?
Oli?
Josh?
Kellin?
Awsten?
