"You got him high?"
I look over at Josh to see he's talking to Oli. I get up from the floor and go hug Josh.
"Pick me up, " I mumble. Josh picks me up and I cling to him for safety and comfort.
"Yeah, it helps him. He hardly tics when high, " Oli says and I look at him. Oli's very pretty. Wait is Josh upset I'm high? I watch them talk but forget to listen to the words they are saying.
I should probably listen. "I'm just going to sleep, " Oliver says still in bed. He sleeps a lot... I want Oli to be happy... Josh is very warm. I put my face against his shoulder and inhale. He also smells really good.
"Okay but you could come with me and kells, " he says.
"We are going somewhere?" I ask, he probably just said where but I wasn't paying attention.
"I need to go meet Vic and talk about Algebra and thought It could be fun if we all went and it is like a picnic, " he says and Oli drinks some water along with Xanax.
"Sure.. Now?" He says running his hand through his hair. Oli looks... Very tired and drained of life. He had darkness under his eyes and skin looks paler than normal. His hair is also messy and not the cleanest. He overall just looks weak and miserable.
"Yeah, like, thirty minutes," josh says and I wiggle my legs to make josh put me down. He does and I hold his hand not wanting to be alone.
It's hard to actually think but I kiss Oli surprising him. He kisses back and I pull away and see him looking behind me. I look too to see josh looking... I cant tell. Is he annoyed? Uncomfortable? I giggle and look at oli to see him looking away blushing.
They should kiss. "Kiss! Pleaseeee!" I say shoving Josh at Oli. Since Josh wasn't prepared he literally just falls on top of the smaller guy. (Bigger than me but he is smaller than josh).
Both start blushing and josh sits up instantly and oli scoots back so he's against his wall sitting up now. "Kellin-"
"Do it! Pleaseeee," I whine and Josh blushes and looks at oli who is looking at his hands. He looks up to see Josh looking at him.
"Go away ass, " he mumbles.
Josh does the opposite and gets in between Oli's knees and leans in. Oli doesn't move out of the way so Josh closes the distance and their lips connect. I smile as they start to kiss.
Oli pulls quickly and josh looks upset but Oli throws his body against Josh's into a hug. Josh hugs back and Oli starts crying- did I miss something?
I back away and go sit on awsten's bed. Oli breaks down and cries into josh's shoulder as josh rubs his back and comforts him. I hear Oli mumble a sorry and I hate how he sounds. He sounds broken and defeated.
"Why are you crying?" Josh says softly grabbing oli's face so he's forced to look at him.
Oli could be crying for a lot of reasons... He's gone through so much, he had a daughter that died... His wife killed herself... He doesn't seem to have a family. He's not with his soulmate(s) and for a long time, josh hated him. He doesn't eat right and he gets money doing something I don't know about. Drugs?
I don't know how he deals with it all...
Oli wipes his face and shakes his head no. "I-i'm fine, " he says sniffling. He gets up but josh grabs his wrist to stop him.
"Just tell me," josh says. "Tell me everything, tell me why you cheated on me with some random person," josh says snd Oli looks at me asking for help.
I get up and go over and put my hand on his stomach and getting in his bed making him get back in the bed. He looks upset that I'm making him sit back down. "You should tell him," I say getting behind him and hugging him as I sit behind him.
Josh is looking at Oli patently.
"He'll hate me, " Oli says and I sigh.
"Josh, are you going to listen to his side of the story and try to understand? Imagine if you were in his situation?" I ask my boyfriend snd he nods.
"Yeah, I'm trying to prepare myself for the worst and I think I can forgive you... Even if it is bad, " he says. I rub start to massage his tense shoulders.
"Just tell him, you'll have to tell him one day, and the sooner the better," I say and josh timidly takes one of Oli's hands.
"Tell him for me?" Oli whispers.
"O-okay, um... So.. You are upset because he cheated on you. You think you weren't good enough..? Right?" I say to josh and he nods.
"Yeah.." He whispers sounding hurt. Oli looks at his hands and avoids looking at Josh. I fake sneeze a few times but it's thankfully ignored.
"Well, that's not the case. It's complicated. I don't know everything but before he dated you he was dating a girl. His soulmate?" I say and oli nods a little but continues to look away.
Josh looks confused but curious. "They fell in love.. And he um.." I say and stop. It's weird telling Josh Oli's secrete. I know I got permission but its weird.
"And I got her pregnant.. So we got married. But... She- s-stuff happened," oli says and starts crying again. He covers his face and I hug him more.
"He then met you and fell in love. He was still with her but... Um. " I say and then oli covers my mouth before I talk again.
"So yeah. I fucked up. She broke up with me and then I broke up with you and left," oli lies. He doesn't want to say she killed herself.
"You're a d-dad? You have a baby- kid?" Josh says and oli sighs. My eyebrows dance uncontrollably, thank you that it wasn't a bad disturbing tic.
"Yeah.. But I'm not with her. I think our match was only temporary," Oli says wiping tears away from his own face.
Josh looks at us shocked and quite. "I'm going to Vic's to study. I- I'm not mad but- I need to think," Josh says getting up. Oli watches him sadly. "I- you- this is just so much... I'll be back tonight, " he says leaving.
When he shuts the door behind him Oli gets his bottle of xanex and takes another one. "I didn't lie, he'll find out their dead later," he says, voice sounding hollow. He lays down and I get in his limp embrace.
"He's not mad. He just needs a little time. He'll forgive you, " I say and Oli sighs.
"Yeah..." He says and closed his eyes. I hate seeing him so sad... I kiss his forehead and go to sleep next to him. I hope Josh doesn't find a way to be mad at Oli. They need each other.
Thoughts?
This book is coming to an end soon, like... It will end around the 60th chapter
Oli kinda lied :c he just needs to tell josh everything
