Spotlight (Razif Haydar 2)

Bab 54 (Danny)

"Angah dah habis fikir ke pasal ni, Angah? Angah tahu kan ini je sumber income Angah." Qiqi beriya lagi menasihati aku ketika kami minum petang di halaman rumah Casa del Razifs petang itu.

"Bukannya Angah nak berhenti terus. I just want to take a hiatus. A year ke macam tu."

"Lama jugak tu, Angah. Okay, no offense but Angah nak buat apa je during those period? Angah dahlah never worked a day in your life. Who's gonna pay the bill whatsoever? A year from now you could be 23/24 and looks fade, Angah."

"Angah tahu."

"Then? Angah still nak pursue that idea? Angah, tak worth itlah. Percayalah cakap Adik."

"Qiqi, I just want to have a rest, okay? This year is so fucked up."

"Ya, Adik tahu. 2020 is already fucked up the day Dance Monkey jadi Song of The Year. But Angah, takkan Angah nak jeopardizekan career Angah sendiri untuk benda macam ni."

"If bukan, then tell me about it? Iqwani, Angah penat tau. Angah penat with the fact that whenever Angah bukak mata, I need to have an image that people have to be okay with it. And look now, I have to date a psycho just to please the crowd."

"Then who gonna please you?"

Aku tak tahu. Aku genuinely tak pernah tahu pasal semua tu. Bukannya aku tak nak tahu tapi aku rasa macam aku tak perlu tahu kut semua tu.

"Angah, do you think it's easy to be the only one who is straight in this family after Along meninggal? No, it's not. But let's face it. It's okay to be someone different than the majority. Angah dok please crowd tapi takde siapa kisah pasal Angah pun. Tak ke fucked up namanya tu?"

"Tapi masalahnya kalau Angah jadi diri sendiri, what would people think about it?"

"Why should people think about it? Angah, it's your life!"

Aku tercyduk. Qiqi spill facts! Dia adalah adik yang aku tak deserve. Dia sangat pandai dan matang dalam berfikir. Tak macam aku. Dahlah baran tak bertempat.

"To be honest, Adik okey je with whatever your decision about taking a break. Cumanya, Adik tak nak Angah buat decision based on emotional state. Banyak benda yang Angah akan menyesal nanti kalau Angah tak fikir panjang sebelum buat sesuatu."

"Angah tahu. Hence I'm back with Aiman. Sebab Angah takut benda akan..."

"Angah!" Qiqi memotong aku. "You're not dating Aiman. You just have to stick with him because you were blackmailed. That's not dating, that's unwilling romance. Eww..."

"Hamboi kau...!"

"Serius apa! Anyway, Adik plan dengan Acik nak balik Brunei next week. Nak ikut?"

"Hmm nice jugak tu. Booking jelah Angah punya. Royal Brunei eh?"

"Ya tahu. Angah tu memang alergik naik Air Asia."

Aku suka dengar Qiqi ni kalau bercakap. Sangat raw dan genuine segala yang dikatakannya itu. Memang berbeza dengan arwah Along dulu.

"Tapi kalau betul Angah nak take a break, better Angah discuss dengan Abang Guna dulu. He's your pimp I mean mentor since your beginning kan?"

Aku mengangguk sahaja. Memang aku sudah set masa untuk berjumpa dengan Guna pun untuk membincangkan semua ini. He should know after all.

"Adik, Angah nak tanya lagi satu benda."

"Dua ringgit."

Aku menjongket kening sebelum dia ketawa semahu-mahunya.

"Angah serius ni."

"Haa yalah, tanyalah."

"Was me breaking up with Jonathan is a good idea?"