Author's Note: This chapter contains depictions of violence!
...
Maybe what he felt for Seokjin wasn't actually love, but just some other form of the emotion that had kept him attached to Jimin for so long.
There were so many variables. And all of them could have led to the right answer.
But he felt it.
It was all around him. In literally everything.
In the way that Seokjin smiled at him, like that particular one was special. Reserved. How his heart raced when he spoke those three little words, so soft and beautiful. How those lips felt like they were pushing air into his lungs and he hadn't been able to breathe properly in days.
And maybe it wasn't perfect. Maybe he wasn't perfect. Maybe his love was different. Maybe it was all sunshine and rainbows. Maybe it was rain clouds and darkness.
But Seokjin had accepted him anyway.
Had chose him anyway.
And that was their truth.
"I know that it was him I fucked first. I know that he was the one I was thinking about while I was inside you. I know that I bring him flowers nearly every single day and I never once brought you any. I know that he makes me feel alive and all you ever made me feel was like I was slowly dying inside. I know that I choose him and nothing is going to change that."
"Would he still chose you if he knew the truth?"
"He already does."
"All of it?"
"All of it."
"I guess I'll just have to confirm that with him." Challenging Jungkook had been like a game once. Something he did when he was tried of being broken down and left forgotten, with no one to patch up his wounds and mend his broken heart but himself.
"The fuck you will." It had always been dangerous, and half of the time hadn't even gotten the results he'd been after. And he realized that now. How he had stumbled. How he had misstepped. How this definitely was not going to result in the outcome he wanted. "You're going to stay the fuck away from him, Jimin. Or I swear to god, there won't be enough of you left for them to bury."
"You wouldn't." But he would. There had always been an invisible line, just out of sight. One that he would occasionally tip toe just slightly too close to, but that he had never actually touched. Because once he crossed it, there would be no going back. It was a one way ticket, and there was no way to purchase a return.
"Try me." There had never been anything precious enough for him to fight this hard for. For him to use the threats of the connections his father had made. But Seokjin was the first and only thing that would ever make him consider, even for a moment, rejoining that life that he had left behind.
"Does Seokjin know?" It was like standing in the middle of a street, with one foot on each side of the white line. He realized, in that moment, that his foot wasn't just lifted, no, it was practically on the ground. "Does he know who you are really?"
"No. And he's never going to." Because there were some things in this world that it was better if you just didn't know. There were some times where the truth could hurt far more than a lie. And the less Seokjin knew, the less bruised he would become.
"It would be unfortunate if he found out." Would Seokjin's truth still be that he would always chose Jungkook? Or would he finally realize the monster who's attention he had captured.
"Jimin." It was strange, how very calm his voice had become. There was no longer even an edge contained within it. No, this was soft, like he was going to agree. Like he was going to lean in and agree to whatever terms the other way offering.
But instead there was a hand wrapping around his throat and he felt himself being lifted. Felt himself being pushed again, head thunking against the wall of the apartment with such force that it actually cracked the dry wall. Left a perfect indentation of the back of his skull. Proof of the concussion he was surely going to suffer if the lack of oxygen didn't manage to end his suffering first.
"I've tried. I have. I was even willing to let this go once I talked to Seokjin. Make sure you didn't actually fuck this up for me. But here's where my compassion ran out. When you threatened to tell him. When you threatened to try and take him from me. And I thought you would have learned your lesson from what happened with my mother. That no one takes the things that are precious to me." It seemed like with each and every word that hand was tightening, until his eyes were budging out of the sockets and all he could do was weakly claw at whatever flesh he could find. "Now, you're going to listen. I'm going to call Taehyung, and I'm going to have him come and get you. You are going to pack your shit, and you are going to go the fuck back to Busan."
Those fingers loosened. Just a little. Just enough for him to take one desperate, gasping breath before they tightened. "And if ever so much as think about me or Seokjin again, I swear to fucking god Jimin, I will make sure your parents never find you. Understand?"
"Ye -" He couldn't even get the word out. Couldn't even begin to know where to start. All he could do was nod his head, as much and as rapidly as that hand wrapped around his throat would allow. And pray that some sort of miracle would occur, that an actual angel would descend from heaven and save him before Jungkook snapped, finally lost every ounce of sense and self control that remained and just finished the job himself.
Because his vision was going black around the edges and he realized in that moment that he was dying. That he couldn't breathe and he was going to die if something didn't change. But he was too weak to actually do anything himself. Couldn't prize those hands away from his body if he tried. And the worst part of it, was that there was truly no one to blame but himself.
Sure, he could blame Jungkook, and truly, at least part of it did lie with him. But it wasn't like he hadn't known. Wasn't like he wasn't aware of what this man was capable of. Wasn't like he hadn't learned those little bits of information and had still chosen to stick around despite it, working off the misguided assumption that despite the lack of love Jungkook apparently held for him, there was still enough affection there that he wouldn't actually hurt him.
If only he'd known then just how wrong he was.
But it wouldn't have changed anything. Because he was just as fucked up as Seokjin. Had believed each and every single thing that Jungkook had told him just as easily. Had fallen in so deeply that he would always chose this man, despite how much he shouldn't. Despite the way literally every single sign said to turn and run as far and as fast as he could in the opposite direction.
He hadn't. And if he had it to do all over again, he wouldn't do it any differently.
He would choose Jungkook. Each and every single time.
Angels didn't exist. And one wasn't coming to save him now. Wasn't coming to free him from the consequences of his own actions.
Because there was only one angel who existed in this realm. And that one was just as entrapped as he was. Just as intertwined in this same fate. Had made the same choices.
Would always make the same choices.
So he accepted his fate. Closed his eyes and gave into it. The very last choice he would ever make.
