He didn't understand why he kept doing this. Only that Jin liked it and that was apparently enough.
Because there he was. Sitting in his car long after the engine had been cut the radio had stopped playing. Sun visor flipped down so he could use the little mirror that hide behind the fold. Used his fingers to attempt to straighten his hair into something acceptable. Into something that didn't look like he had just spent two hours at the gym and was currently a sweaty mess.
Tried to keep up the image that he had set for this relationship. Tried to make sure each photo carried the same tone.
That he was the one in control here. That each decision, every step forward and each one back was entirely his choice. The only one he had placed into Seokjin's hand's was when it ended.
And he hadn't even been able to accept that much, had he? Had been so unable to stop the panic that rose up within his chest each time his baby said it was over. That it was too much. That they should stop. That they were going to stop.
He hated that feeling. Hated he way it made his chest fell tight, like tears were welling up within it. Hated the way it made his heart constrict and beat rapid fire against his ribs. Hated the way it made his head spin and his thoughts cloud and his brain suddenly unable to process rational thought. Because all he knew was he had to do anything to make Jin stay.
Flicking through the pictures, he tried to chose one that would go along with the theme he had apparently chosen for this entire endeavor. One that screamed 'daddy energy', an absolutely ridiculous term that Taehyung kept using that had somehow found it's way into his vocabulary.
He wasn't quite smiling. And he thought he must have taken that picture in between two other's. But there was something flickering across his face. Smugness, maybe. Hand lifted in a mock greeting, dark eyes dancing in the light. Hair falling over one half of his face, casting a shadow across the expanse. Liked the way it almost looked like his lips were forming into a pout, despite what his eyes said.
Making his choice, he clicked over to their message window, inserting the picture before being faced with the knowledge that he was going to have to actually write something. All of it should have come so easily. It was always so fun to play with Jimin. To prey on his emotions and manipulate him in all the best ways until he got exactly what he wanted.
But with Seokjin it was different. There was so much there that could be picked apart. So much that could be used against him. And it would all get him where he wanted to go. Quick and easy and maybe that was the path he should have taken. The one that would lead them directly to destruction.
But he wanted to savor this. Wanted to enjoy it for just a little while longer. And it was so easy to be fun and flirty and even sweet when it came to Seokjin. When he knew that the other was going to respond so well. The game would take longer, have a few more steps that needed to be completed. But it still got him exactly where he wanted to be.
Between those thighs, tucked away inside those velvety walls and he absolutely had to stop thinking about it because there was nothing stopping him from just turning the car back on and driving to Seokjin's house and taking him the way he wanted.
'Missing my baby'
Complete with a heart emoji that he felt incredibly silly actually clicking on and using. Especially when Seokjin never sent one back.
Sighing, he shook his head to try and clear it, before he drove too deeply into what that might mean. Sunk his teeth into his lip and pressed send, smiling softly as it popped up on the screen.
Chances were exceptionally good that he would get one back in the next few minutes. But he placed his phone on silent and slipped it into the bag currently resting on the seat next to him. Because this had always been his favorite part of the game. Giving a little and then ignoring what he got back. Despite the way his fingers flexed against his own leg, wanting desperately to check his phone every thirty seconds until the reply finally came. Wanted to type one back instantly and give a little bit more.
But that wasn't how he played. And the game was the only thing keeping him from falling down a hole with no return.
