:🌸: ➤ 𝚂𝚊𝚒𝚘𝚞𝚖𝚊 𝚂𝚑𝚒𝚝𝚙𝚘𝚜𝚝𝚜

Watch the video on the top

^ Turn up your volume to hear the audio

__________

Kaede: Why can't dinosaurs clap?

Shuichi: Because their arms are too shor-

Kokichi: Because they're dead

__________

Shuichi: Kokichi tries to act all tough but we just recently got a cat and he named it Missy

Kokichi: For the last time, it's short for Missle Launcher

__________

Kokichi: Would you shoot your best friend for 10 million dollars?

Shuichi: I-

Kaito: You can shoot me, and then, we all can go to space in our favorite rocketship!

Kaede: You can shoot me too! Than we can get 20 million dollars!

Kokichi: Good thinking, fuck the system

Shuichi: Why are you guys like this?

__________

Ryoma: Nothing is free

Kaede: Love is free!

Rantaro: Adventure is free!

Kirumi: Knowledge is free

Kokichi: Anything is free if you take it without paying

Ryoma:

Rantaro:

Kaede:

Shuichi: Kokichi, that's illegal....

Kokichi: But accurate

__________

Kokichi: Yeah, well, I am not a human. I am a one-star yelp review that came to life

__________

Shuichi: Hey Rantaro?

Rantaro: What do you need?

Shuichi: Well, the Warriors of Hope were ordering me around and one nearly ended my life, and not thinking about it. I told Kokichi.

Rantaro: Go on....

Shuichi: He left, I'm worried that he's going to go beat them up or something. Can you stop him?

Rantaro: Kokichi won't hit a child

Shuichi: He won't?

Rantaro: Never.

Shuichi:

Rantaro:

Rantaro: *sprints towards the door*

__________

Shuichi: I'm gay

Miu: I'm horny

Korekiyo: I'm weird

Kokichi: Oh bitch please, I am all of the above, get over yourselves

__________

Kokichi: When I first met Kaito, I thought he was a dumbass

Kaito: .....and?

Kokichi:

Kokichi: I still do

__________

Kokichi: Truth or Dare?

Shuichi: Truth

Kokichi: I dare you to come here and kiss me right now

Shuichi rising up from his spot: Fine

Kaito: He didn't even say dare??

__________

Kokichi: Do you know how I actually hurt my ankle?

Kiibo: Yes

Kokichi: I was hula-hooping. I attend a class for fitness and fun

Kiibo: Oh my god

Kokichi: I've mastered all the moves- The Pizza Toss, The Tornado, The Scorpion, The Oopsie Doodle.

Kiibo: Why are you telling me all of this?

Kokichi, smirking: Because people will say that I lied and won't believe you.

Kiibo: I-

__________

Rantaro: Any extreme sport you've tried?

Kokichi: Completing my homework as Monokuma is collecting

Rantaro: Wait- we had homework?

Kokichi: Now you have to participate with me :)

__________

Kokichi looking for Shuichi

Kokichi: Hey, have you seen this man?

Kokichi: Average height, navy blue hair, emo

Kokichi: Clearly likes both genders, but in denial that he likes males

__________

Tsumugi: God dammit, I accidentally wrote gay porn again.

Keebo: Wh-

Keebo: H-

Keebo: I-

Keebo: HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY WRITE GAY PORN? AND AGAIN?!

__________

Kokichi: Can you at least TRY to see things from my perspective?

Gonta: *squats down*

Kokichi: I despise you

__________

Kaito: How petty can you get?

Kokichi: I once edited wikipedia page to win an arguement

__________

Shuichi: Due to personal reasons I will be sinking to the bottom of the ocean in a large metal box

Kaede: Kokichi said "Nice weather" and you said "Thanks", didn't you?

Shuichi: The reasons are personal

__________

Shuichi: Kokichi, do you have a second ultimate?

Kokichi : Getting out of corn mazes

Shuichi: Uh- okay? Why?

Kokichi : I keep finding myself in corn mazes

Kaede: Shuichi, Kokichi why are we in a corn maze right now?

Shuichi: Wait- wha-

Kokichi : Guess it's time for me to shine.

__________

Rantaro and Kaede looking out the window

Shuichi: What are you guys doing?

Rantaro: Watching Kokichi assert his dominance over a wasp in the garden

*wasp buzzing*

*Kokichi buzzing louder*

Shuichi:

Shuichi: Why is he doing this

Kaede and Rantaro: *shrugging*

Shuichi: Who's winning?

Kaede, sighing: The wasp

Shuichi looks out the window again

*Kokichi running away from the wasp, screaming as the wasp dive-bombs him*

__________

Kokichi: "Ladies and Gentlemen" is unnecessary gendered, overly formal, lengthy, and honestly I'm falling asleep already

Kokichi: "Cowards" on the other hand, is inclusive, to the point, and dramatic