Limerence (Dauntless Series #2)

Chapter 20

Ever since that day, all I want to do is to search for that Fleur Reyes. I don't know her face, only the color of her hair that's why I'm going to have a hard time searching for her.

That was fucking weeks ago! I cannot get her smirk out of my mind! I don't feel good about this.

What if it turns out that Marceu has been fooling me all along and me being the head over heels girlfriend denied to acknowledge that. What if he has a relationship with that Fleur Reyes and they are living their best life in the province, kaya minsan ay hindi ko siya nakakausap? Even in his breaks, lagi na rin siyang busy. Nasapo ko ang ulo ko. I am thinking too much which is not healthy for me.

I opened my laptop and tried to search on how do you catch someone who's having an affair. You can't expect me to sit here and do nothing when in fact someone is slowly snatching my boyfriend from me. And if it ended up that way, she's not the only one to blame here. Marceu will taste my wrath too.

I always say I trust Marceu completely, ngunit hindi ko masisiguro kung ganoon pa rin, lalo na't nakakaramdam na ako ng panlalamig sa kaniya.

I clicked the website that catches my attention and read through the possible choices that I would consider making if I decided to really pry on them.

"Are you coming here next week?" I asked him one time. It took a moment for him to answer. My suspicions were slowly growing by that time.

"I'm afraid not..."

"Why?"

I bit my lower lip when I heard him sigh. I am gathering up all my power to trust on him but how can I if he's being like this? Marceu has never kept a thing from me ever since I told him my concerns of him not telling me about Nikki, but now he's at it again.

"I'm just really busy, Saoirse, " he paused for a moment. "I gotta go now, my Professor is looking for me."

"Okay. Love---"

Even before I could finish my words, he already hang up the phone. I stared at it for a very long time while processing what just happened. My heart is acheing. Hindi ako nag-iinarte dahil hindi ako nakatanggap ng 'I love you' mula sa kaniya. Sadyang nagulat lang ako.

I took my medicine right after that. It didn't help that I was feeling so emotional that night so I ended up crying to sleep again. Just like the usual, but this time with fear of my gut instincts being true.

Hindi ako takot maiwan. Takot ako na kapag nangyari iyon, hindi ko alam kung saan ko pupulutin ang sarili ko. Hindi ko alam kung saan ako magsisimula ulit. I gave him my all. My whole self in hopes of him loving me completely. It's not his fault because I gave it myself, and I am so mad for being such a head over heels for someone as gorgeous as him. I am so naive.

Kumaway ako nang makasalubong ko sa hallway ng ER si Doctor Yohan. Nagulat ito ngunit agad di namang nakabawi. Lumapit ito sa akin.

"How are you? Lagi kitang nakikita sa tuwing may follow-up ka pero hindi naman kita nalalapitan. Pasensya na."

He is heading to the cafeteria to probably have some lunch while I am on my way home. Si Seamus ang susundo sa akin dahil saktong pauwi na rin ito galing sa isang shoot sa Batangas. I glanced at Doctor Yohan who's already looking at me.

"You look gloomy for some reason."

"I'm just tired, that's why..."

Should I ask him about Fleur Reyes?

"Something is troubling you. You know you can rely on me only if you wants to." He said. Gusto ko nang magpatianod at sabihin sa kaniya ang mga bumabagabag sa isipan ko ngunit pinigilan ko ang sarili ko dahil una, wala akong pruweba sa mga iniisip ko at pangalawa, matalik silang magkaibigan ni Marceu. Kahit na sabihin kong itago niya sa kaibigan niya ang napag-usapan namin, hindi maiiwasang hindi siya madulas sa oras na magkausap sila ni Marceu.