Miserable at Best

Chapter 1: Broken, Hurt And Miserable

I hold my jacket around my body tightly as I walk down the dark, empty street silently. The wind blows above my head and the cold breeze touches my numb pale face swiftly. I think the winter this year is much colder than it was last year.

I sighed as I pushed open the door of the convenient store that serves as the source of my and my father's foods. I slowly made my way to the shelves and get everything that I have to buy. Then, I quickly headed to the counter and pay for the stuffs.

"$209.65 all." The cashier said as she gave me my change.

I silently put the change in my pocket and get the bags of our foods for the next whole week. Then I head to the door and go out of the store and back to my house.

I sighed as I count the change from the money I used to pay the foods. As ashamed as I am to admit it, but we are actually considered as poor. I have to stop from studying and work at the age of as early as sixteen to provide at least enough money for our expenses. My father didn't dare to find another job when he got fired from his last one. And just decided to put all the responsibilities in my hands and be a complete lazy asshole when my mother died. Since that moment, all he knows to do is sit in front of the television while shouting at me either to get him something or curse me for my mistakes. And if I'm lucky to meet him in his most raging time, I wouldn't hear anything from his mouth instead his punches and kicks would do the honors.

I know I'm in the right age now to be all by myself. And him being so abusive is a great reason to run away. But no... I'm still sticking around him enduring all the pains that he gives me every time. Well, honestly I'm not doing this because of the fact that he's still my father and I'm still his daughter. But because my mother asked me to do so before her last breath left her mouth. It's so crazy and stupid to know that even my father is worthless, my mom still loved him very much. She was so devoted and addicted to him that she risked everything for him... Even her own life.

Good thing I don't become like her who happened to be so obsessed of Dad. But still I have to deal with the fact that I'm living in hell for the grant of her favor.

I slowly pushed the door and get inside the house. Dad didn't dare to look up at me as I passed the living room to the kitchen. I quickly take the foods from the bag and put it in the fridge. Then I started to do the overflowing dishes in the sink that are stuck there since last night.

"Amanda!!!" Dad shouted that made me to jolt up.

I wiped my hands dry and silently walked over to him. His eyes stare at me fiercely as I stand there emotionless.

"What the fuck you bitch?!! You're so fucking slow on moving! And what's the shit you're standing there?!!" He screamed angrily.

"Why'd you call me?," I asked plainly to him and he looked at me dumbfounded.

"Why? What the fuck!!! Aren't you going to make me some dinner?!! Don't you see it's already evening!! You're so stupid you motherfucking bitch! Are you even using your brain?!! You're a shit! Such an asshole!! You're a very stupid slut! Worse than a whore!!!" He curse very madly.

I bite my lips and clench my knuckles as I try my best to stop my emotion. Even though I hear it from him almost everyday, the times I do still hurt me so bad. His words sting right to my heart and everything he says just makes me weak. I don't know why I'm still hurt even I'm very used to it. Maybe it's because of the fact that I still can't believe it all comes from my own father. And as a daughter it hurts so much to think that your own father do it to you.

"Aren't you really going to move there?!!" He shouted and threw the remote on me.

The thing hit me in the arm and I sob as I look at him fearfully.

"Fuck! Are you really pissing me you bitch?!" He said through gritted teeth as he stood up from the couch and slowly walks up to me.

I start to shake and my legs weaken. Tears roll down my cheeks as I back away,from my father.

"I-I'm s-sorry... P-please daddy no..." I whispered shakily as he approached me.

"You're such an idiot, you bitch.." He said through gritted teeth and quickly hit my face with his hard knuckles.

I landed straightly on the ground and my vision blurred. Blood starts dripping off from my nose and mouth as I try to stand up.

"You never ever did anything good you shit!" He said and kicked my stomach hardly.

My back hit the ground hardly as I fell on the floor. I hold my stomach as the pain vibrates throughout my body.

"You're so shit! You're stupid! And very! Very! Useless!!" He shouted as he kicked my side for every word.

I shout and scream in agony as I try to endure the pain that shoots in my body as his foot makes contact with my side. My eyes are shut tightly while tears continue to roll down my cheeks. I bite my lips hardly that it even starts to bleed as I resist the pains that sting my every nerve.

"There! That's what right for you!! You're so stupid that you have to be punished first before you learn your lesson!! You're such an asshole you bitch!!" He said before walking off, leaving me panting and blooded on the floor.

I breath slowly as I try to adjust myself from the pain. I cry silently as the pain numb my whole body.

Having this kind of life is really not what I wish for. I never even think to suffer from this. But looks like the fate is so unkind to me that it chose me for this kind of life out of the people here in this cruel world. And the worst part is, I couldn't do anything but obey its will... And just accept my life and live for as long as I can.

Author's Note:

Phew! Done!! XD Hope you like the first chap! ^0^
I wanna know what can you say... :))