for, liar

Chapter 82

"Miles seems like a nice young man. He looks quite smitten with you."

We have been walking around the mall for two hours and my legs are going to give out at any second. I swear this woman isn't human sometimes the way she can just continue shopping.

"I feel like it's not even real. I think I got really lucky this time, mom. It's crazy."

I'm not going overboard and saying that I've found the love of my life because it's still too soon to tell. All I know is that I've never felt this kind of connection with anyone before. Even with Ben there was always something missing and with Miles it's like all of the pieces fit together perfectly and I'm living my idealistic fantasy.

"I can tell he makes you really happy just by hearing you talk about him. I guess Thanksgiving with your father went well, then? Y'know, considering the boy is still breathing."

I snort. "You know dad is all talk. Yeah, it went well even though he invited the freakin' Cunningham's."

Her eyes widened. She stops in her tracks and faces me. "What? Are you joking?"

I shake my head and get a little heated just thinking about it again. I told myself I would let it go but damn that made me so mad.

"No. Apparently something happened with their turkey so George thought it was a fabulous idea to invite my ex boyfriend and their parents over for Thanksgiving dinner. They even spent the night because of the storm."

"I know your father isn't the brightest man but wow that's a new low. What was he thinking?"

"He wasn't. Even Lily thought it was kind of shitty and she said she'd talk to him about it when we left."

"Doubt it." She scoffs. "That bottled blonde breast enhanced bitch won't stick up for anyone if the world depended on it."

I stifle a laugh and feel a bit guilty since our last interaction wasn't all that bad. "She was surprisingly pleasant, actually."

"That is surprising."

We walk into the Macy's that was packed with people as soon as we cross the anti-theft alarms. I almost got knocked into mom by a little kid running around with a giant stuffed Winnie the Pooh plush. People always bring their entire family to shop and don't even keep an eye on the little beasts. I always think I want children until I'm actually out in public and get terrorized by stranger's kids in every setting.

Mom grabs onto my arm and tugs me toward the women's clothing. I still haven't found anything I'd like to get for Miles that could be remotely useful to him. I like giving gifts with meaning that don't get tossed in the closet because they simply have no use for them.

"What could I get for Miles? He practically has everything he needs so anything would just be an accessory."

"Why don't you just ask him what he wants?" She asks.

That would be the easy way out but knowing him he'll probably say he doesn't want anything or ask for something cheap like a shirt because he hates the idea of me spending money on him. I've never actually bought him a gift before so I'm a little nervous about our first Christmas together. I usually just got Ben an assortment of cologne, shampoos, and other smell good things that he asked for because he had a weird obsession with his scent.

"Would it be too soon to get him a cheesy gift? Like something with our picture on it or something romantic?"

I don't know why I feel like I'm not allowed to be romantic since we've only been together for six months. There doesn't have to be a time stamp on love. I know what I feel and I should be allowed to express that to him without feeling weird about it.

"Is he cheesy? Does he like romantic things?" She asks me.

"Yeah, I think so. He won't admit it though. He likes watching rom-coms with me and we'll do cutesy shit on our date nights."

She smiles and starts flipping through the hangers of shirts in the clearance section. "That's nice. I feel like you needed that. Your relationship with Benjamin was always peculiar to me."

"Because he didn't actually love me. He loved the idea of me. We were friends for so long and I think he just thought we were meant to be together so he fought for it for a while until he didn't care anymore."

"You two were also very young. Still had a lot of growing to do. I'm sure there was a time that he did love you and he probably still does, but just because you love someone doesn't mean you belong together."

She grabs one of the hangers off the rack and holds out a navy blue sweater in front of her. "Would this look good on me?"

I smile and give her a thumbs up. "Yeah, that's actually really cute. How much?"

She checks the tag and makes a face. "Too much." She mumbles and sets it back on the rack, continuing down the rest of the aisle.

I reach over and grab the sweater from the rack to add to the small stack of shirts I was already holding onto from what I've found in clearance. I got me and Maddy matching Christmas sweaters since she somehow talked me into matching this year for the Christmas party we got invited to. I was going to try to find one for Miles to wear but all the men's sweaters were just oversexualized or mediocre jokes about alcohol. I wanted something a little more original for him and a lot less cringe-worthy.

"Is he into car stuff? You could get him some seat covers or a new steering wheel cover." Mom suggests.

Miles loves his car but he isn't the kind of guy who obsesses over making it his life. He keeps it tidy without having to put all of his time and money into it. If anything, a new steering wheel cover would be an add on to the actual gift that I still haven't decided on.

"Maybe. I don't know. I didn't think this would be so hard."

I'm trying not to get frustrated. I have a month to figure out what I want to get him. It would just be easier to find something today for him on Black Friday so I don't miss any deals. Even though the deals today really aren't that great. We missed all the good stuff at four this morning.

"If you're trying to be sentimental, think of something that you two either have in common or shared together that would make a really cute gift to define your relationship. What do you think really defines it?"

We've done a lot together. Park dates, takeout, binge watching any movie we can find on Netflix, our trip to the beach, the fair date that really didn't end up as he planned, and doing our best with our busy schedules just to get to know each other.

"I don't know how to put that into a gift, mom. If it was me, I wouldn't even need a gift. Those experiences are enough, but I wanted to give him something to show him that the time we've been together has meant a lot to me."

"Okay, then save the cheesy romantic gifts for your anniversary and give him things he needs or that y'all can do together. Has he mentioned anything he wants?"

"He's mentioned a few things. He wanted to learn how to play billiards because I told him I used to play with dad. He said he wanted to pick back up skateboarding and just hasn't gotten around to it. I'm pretty sure he also said he needed a new wallet since the one he has been using is basically in shreds."

She laughs and looks at me.

"What?" I ask.

She shakes her head and keeps that half-grin on her face. "You don't even need my help. You already know what to get him."

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