Colonel Nolan

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Nolan and Marva Lynn go see a movie but Nolan keeps disturbing the other patrons in the theater. He eventually goes as far as to giving away the ending to the film and the audience boos him, and the security guard kicks them out until the kids finish watching the movie. Finally, Marva Lynn is unable to control her rage any longer, and she yells at him, telling Nolan that no one cares what he thinks which the audience cheers for but leaves him embarrassed. Hurt by Marva Lynn's words, Nolan takes his family home, accuses Marva Lynn of robbing him of his "certain quiet dignity," and then drives off, not knowing if Marva Lynn will ever see him again. Nolan keeps driving so far that he ends up in the outskirts. He eventually arrives at a country bar to think about what happened when he meets a waitress named Lynn Otter Smith, which is Karl's wife, who sings a song that relates to his issues. Nolan returns home but can't get her song out of his head. He goes bowling and while singing Lynn's music to his ball bowls a 280. He drives back and plans to get the song recorded. It is given to the local radio station and the song is an instant success. Nolan becomes Lynn's manager, "Colonel Nolan," much to the objection of Marge, who winds up jealous that Lynn's attachment to Nolan could surpass her own.

Lynn wants more from Nolan than him being her manager, but Nolan cares for his wife and kids and proclaims he made the right choice. He tells her that he can't be the man for her and only wanted to share her talents with the world. Nolan explains that he loves Marva Lynn and can't think about doing something that could hurt her. Although hurt by this, Lynn respects his solution to be with his family. Nolan offers the man to be her new manager as he rushes home to be with Marva Lynn. Once home, he is able to reaffirm his love for her and they have sex.

On Lynn's last appearance on the Jimmy Dean show, she sings a bluesy song and wishes Nolan and Marge nothing but the best for them. Although Karl saw his wife on TV and make his cousins Paul, Grady, Ed, Fran, Bill, Mick, Roy and Fred laugh.

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