My Yellow

Part 4 - Rose

Han Sungo and I stare at each other. I look away from him and back at Keeho. "You look like you saw a ghost," Keeho tilts his head. "Are you okay?"

"I'm fine," I shake my head and take a deep breath. "Do you guys need anything right now? I think I'm going to go lie down," I whisper, feeling Sungo's eyes on me.

"Not right now," Keeho furrows his brows. "I'll come get you if we do, are you sure you're okay?" I nod my head and hold tight onto my cup.

"Yeah," I nod. "I'll see you later," I force a smile and pat his shoulder. I head to the door, then stop seeing Maddy heading this way. She's gonna want me to stay. I take a deep breath and turn, going back to Keeho. "Never mind," I laugh a bit. "I'll stay to hype you guys up."

"Are you sure? You look sickly," Keeho reaches his hand and touches my forehead. "Dude you're ice cold."

"Am I," I touch my own forehead. He's right. "Weird, I don't know why," I do know why. When I get anxiety my body goes cold. "I'm sure I'll be okay," I smile at Maddy as she walks in.

"Whoa Rose," she raises her brows. "You look sick."

"That's what I'm saying!" Keeho shakes his head. "You should go lay down," I glance at Sungo and shiver. I don't want Maddy stuck here with him.

"No I'm okay," I nod. "Plus practice won't be that long," I say with a small smile.

"You have to stay after in case anyone wants to learn English," Maddy says with a nod. "So if you need to go rest you should right now," she gives me a small smile. I give her a look, then motion to Sungo with my eyes. She looks at me confused.

'Pervert' I mouth and Motion to him again. She makes a 'o' with her mouth and hugs her waist. "I'll stay," I say, Maddy and I look at each other. She knows I never want her to go through what I had to with John, so she doesn't protest.

"Alrighty," Keeho says, looking at us funny. "Well don't get too turned on by our sick dance moves."

"No promises," I joke and push his shoulder. I look around the room, and see Theo on his phone. I squint my eyes. "I'll be back," I say and walk up to him. "I'm determined now," Theo looks at me. "To make you talk to me, even if I die trying," I cross my arms. He scoffs and looks away from me, back to his phone. "We have a singing lesson together tomorrow," I say to him carefully. "So at some point you will have to talk to me." He looks back at me, then back down and pushes past me, walking away. I stand there looking at where he was once standing. Why does he hate me so much? I turn back to Keeho and Maddy, seeing Sungo now talking to them. As much as I don't want to go over there, I know I need to. I watch Sungo touch Maddy's shoulder and something in me activates. I rush over there.

"You should come see me after practice, there's a better position I want to offer you," I hear Sungo say to her.

"Hey maddy," I smile and wrap my arms around her, I tap her three times, she nods. "Can you go to my room and grab my notebook? The one I need for vocal warm ups? I forgot it," I force a laugh. Maddy nods and I let go of her.

"Okay, I'll be back, if I can even find it in the mess that is your room," she laughs and mouths 'thank you'. I nod and turn back to Sungo, about to tell him off, but something in me shuts down. I just stare at him, not sure of what I was going to say.

"Hello Rose," Sungo gives me a creepy smile. I look away from him and at Keeho. Keeho raises his eyebrows and tilts his head. "Do you mind staying after for a bit? We have a conversation to finish," he reaches to touch my shoulder. I flinch slightly, but when I don't feel his hand I look back and see Theo, gripping Sungos wrist while his arm was still outstretched. Theo just stares straight ahead, not saying anything. I lift my finger, then drop my hand. "Can I help you Theo?" Sungo sounds offended.

"Yeah actually," I watch Theo grip his wrist tighter. "I heard you have some important meetings today at your building, so why are you here?"

"I came to see how the new girls were settling in," Sungo shakes his hand out of Theos grip. "I was just leaving," he stares at Theo.

"Leave faster," Theo turns and walks back to a few of the members. I purse my lips together and step back away from Sungo.

"Well I'll see you later Rosey," Sungo winks at me. I shiver.

"Bye," I say quick and turn my head to look at Theo. He is like my guardian angel. Sungo turns and walks over to a few of the managers. I feel like I can breathe again.

"He is such a creep," Keeho whispers.

"Who? Theo?" I ask turning back to him.

"What? No Sungo," Keeho laughs. "Why is he so creepy to you guys."

"No clue," I sigh. "But I don't like it, and I hope to god I don't ever have to be in the same room as him alone."

"I hope so too," Keeho looks down at his watch. "Hey practice is about to start, I'll help you with the lamp right after if no one wants to have an English class today." I nod and smile. I walk to a corner, putting my back against the mirror, I slide down and sit on the floor. I look down at my phone.
From Maddy:
Is he gone?
To Maddy:
Not yet, he is talking to some of the managers. But they're about to practice so you might want to come back here.
I look up from my phone and nibble on my bottom lip, watching Theo. I want to thank him, but the last time I did he acted like he didn't do anything. I look back down at my phone and sigh. My heart stops. I see an unknown number text me.
Unknown:
Hey princess, how's Korea?
I look up, and immediately turn my phone over. I see Makayla come in. I can't tell her, she will freak out. I look back ahead and feel like the world is closing in on me, I feel like someone is stepping on my chest. I can't feel my legs. I can hear Maddy talking to me but I don't know what she is saying. I stand up.

"I need..." I take a deep breath. "I need to go lay down," I whisper not looking at her. Maddy puts her hand on my shoulder but I shake it off.

"Okay," She furrows her brows and looks around the room. "Sungo isn't here anymore.. are you okay?" I feel my phone vibrate in my hand. I can't feel anything in my body. "I'll stay after for English lessons okay? Just go lay down," She says gently. I feel myself starting to hyperventilate. I turn and walk out of the room, I hear Keeho call my name but I can't focus. I don't even realize I reach my room until I'm staring at the door. I take out my key and open the door. I walk in, slamming it, then locking it. I feel the hot tears starting to fall down my face. I feel my breathing pick up, I feel my chest ache. I can't breathe. I feel like the world is spinning. I can hear his voice all around me. I can feel him touching me.

"Please stop," I whisper trying to catch my breath. I hold my chest and start coughing. I feel like I'm back in my old room, I can smell him. "Please stop, I said no," I feel my knees buckle underneath me and I fall. I grip the carpet under me, trying to tell myself it's not real. It's just a PTSD attack. I look up and see that I'm in my old room. I start to cry harder, trying to get my head out of here. I look around until I find a clock. I watch the big hand tick by. I listen to the noise it's making. This clock is a unique clock that sits in my dorm room. I feel my breathing start to calm down, as my dorm room comes back into focus. I lower my head and sniffle. John isn't here, I remind myself. He can't hurt you. I lean back and look down at my phone, watching it light up with another text.
Unknown:
This is any way to treat your fiance?
I look back at the clock on the wall, feeling my body start to heave again.