endgame ✦ draco malfoy

pretty when i cry

this chapter is inspired by Lana Del Rey's song, Pretty When You Cry. You can listen to it while reading if you'd like.

july 1997:

Packing her bags for the summer, humming as she shoved her shortest mini skirts into her suitcase was Stella Blackwood. She's had many sleepless nights thinking about her summer holiday with Draco Malfoy. How she will be spending three whole weeks alone with him in Florence, Italy.

As she shut her last suitcase, Draco apparated into Stella's bedroom, empty handed. He wore a vacant expression, something Stella is not used to whenever she saw Draco.

"What's wrong?", asked Stella. "Did I pack too much? I know it's only three weeks but I also have to take into account the extra week in Italy with my family", she rambled.

"I can't do this", Draco said looking down at the floor with his hands in his pockets.

"What?"

"I can't do this with you, Stella"

"I-I-I don't understand", she stuttered, completely taken back. "What happened between Cotillion and today?"

"You're just not... You're not worth wasting an entire summer with"

"'Wasting an entire summer'? That's what you think? Spending a few weeks in Italy with me is you 'wasting your summer'?"

"Yes, indeed"

"Cut the bullshit, Malfoy, and stop talking to me like I'm your mother", she sneered. "I don't understand what I did wrong"

"I'm not going to go into my seventh year completely tied down to someone who doesn't love me"

Stella froze, not knowing what to say to Draco. Her lip started to quiver and her head started to get hot, angry that Draco would say the things he did out of the blue. Tears started to well up in her eyes as she tried to understand why he was doing this to her. She couldn't help but feel angry, sad, and disappointed all at the same time. He made her feel like she was a waste of her time, like the past seven seven months didn't matter to him. She spent much of her time trying to hide from emotions in fear of getting heartbroken again. Right as she was about to let her guard and fully become vulnerable with Draco, he made her feel like all she did was exist in his world, like she had no purpose.

"Is this what you do, Draco Malfoy? You just rope girls in and then fuck them over when they get too close? What the fuck happened to me being 'your world'?"

"Don't do this to me, Stella", Draco said shaking his head and looking towards the window, avoid Stella's eyes.

"Do what? What the fuck am I doing, Draco?!", she shouted as warms tears started to stream down her cheek.

"You're making me feel bad!", he shouted back.

"And that's my fault? Sorry that I, Stella Blackwood, is making the Draco Malfoy feel remorse for something HE did!"

"The only feeling I feel when I'm with you is regret", he scoffed. "I knew better than to get in a relationship with you. I saw what you did to Theo and I should've seen the red flags"

"You make no fucking sense"

"Get it through your stupid head that not everyone wants to spend the rest of their life with you"

"You're so fucking two-faced, I can't even begin to understand. One day you're talking about how you need me and the next you're telling me that you don't"

"I don't need you, I don't need anybody. I'm Draco bloody Malfoy"

"Well, why don't you go be Draco Malfoy somewhere else", she said wiping her tears with her wrist. "Leave!"

Without hesitation, Draco walked out of Stella's bedroom, slamming her door before walking down the stairs. Once he reached the foyer, he disappeared out of Stella's home and into his bedroom at Malfoy Manor.

He paced back and forth in his bedroom running his finger through his hair. Draco never intended to hurt Stella but he felt that it was necessary for him to end things with her. He wasn't ready to fully commit to Stella. He wanted to spend his last summer before his seventh year doing what he did every year, run around Europe with the boys, having the most chaotic and sinful holiday.

As much as he loves Stella, Draco feared that she did not feel the same way. He rather break her heart and have her hate him forever rather than not hear her say she loved him too. He felt that Stella was truly never over her relationship with his best friend and probably never will. She always brought up Theo's name and gets protective, like when he took Pansy Parkinson as his date to the Snowflake Ball. He felt that Stella was never going to give in and break down her barriers to fully love him as she did Theo.

After seven months together, Draco thought that Stella was going to love him, but she never said the words "I love you". Draco continued to tell her how much he means to her by setting up their first date in the Astronomy Tower and saying that she was "his world". Although Draco could've told Stella that he loves her himself, he said "I love you" without having to say it.

Draco knew that he told Stella that we would wait for as long as it takes for her to open up to him, but he couldn't wait any longer. If he couldn't wait for Stella, then she deserves to be with someone who will. After what he said to her today, Stella will have to find someone who will love her the way she deserves.