endgame ✦ draco malfoy

no one else

   "Wake the fuck up", a deep voice demanded, hitting me in the face with a pillow.

    The cold pillow hitting my face instantly woke me up. I forced my eyes open and saw Draco towering over me. He had his hands placed on his waist and his bright blue eyes glaring down at me.

    I picked up the pillow next to me that was used to build the wall that kept Theo and I on our sides of the bed and hit Draco in the head with it.

    "What the fuck is your problem?!", I shouted. "Why don't you just suffocate me with the pillow next time?"

    "Don't tempt me", Draco growled. "What are you doing sleeping in Theo's clothes and bed?"

    I turned my head to Theo's side of the bed and saw that it was empty. His pillows were fluffed and his side of the bed was made neatly.

    "Whatever", he scoffed. "I always knew you were going to run back to him"   

    "I'm not running back to Theo", I said sitting up. "He just took me home last night and put me to bed"

    "He was your first love and every time we were together, you were reminded of him"

    "It was only because we got together too soon after my breakup with Theo. I never got closure but when I did, I stopped thinking about him"

    "But you still loved him..."

    "No, I don't. I still love you"

    Why did I say that? Why did I have to say that now? Why did I have to say that again?

    Draco relaxed his eyebrows and his lips ajar. His eyes were diverted away from me and he started to run his hand through his platinum blonde hair, pacing back and forth in front of the bed.

    I don't know what I was expecting when I accidentally let "I still love you" slip, but I just thought he would say it back or something, anything. Draco pacing back and forth in front of me is better than disapparating out of the room. Actually, I can't tell what I prefer, Draco leaving me behind or him looking stressed out at the fact that I just told him that I still love him. When he's not in the room, I at least don't have to see him running his hands through his hair like I just made him choose between wearing his Armani suit or his Saint Laurent suit. Watching him just panic right in front of me is starting to make me panic.

    Was telling Draco that I still love him that bad? It's not like he didn't know that I love him, because he already does. After talking to Theo last night, he made it seem like I need to keep on reassuring Draco that I'm going to keep loving him no matter what. How far is too far when it comes to this? I can't just keep on telling expressing my feelings to Draco just for him to not do the same.

    "Why did you have to tell me that?", he asked, stilling pacing in front of me. "I didn't need to hear that you still love me"

    That isn't something someone wants to hear.

    "You telling me this... it changes things"

    "Is that change bad or good?", I asked, getting out of bed. I walked over to Draco and took both of his hands, stopping him in his place. "You told Theo you love me, you told Alex, Stass, and Blaise. Why are you telling everyone that you love me instead of me?"

    "I can't", he said shaking his head.

    "You can't or you won't?"

    "Stella", he sighed, tucking my hair behind my ear. "I care about you and you deserve to be with someone better than me"