Can You Save Me? { Sam Pottorff }

Chapter 55 ~ I love him. This is different. God, that smile.

reader discretion is advised.

DO NOT KILL ME !!! - this one girl

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Jazmin's P.O.V.

Walking up the steps for the last time in maybe a really long time is harder than I thought it'd be. It wasn't so much actually doing it, it was about who I was going to be missing out on. I would actually miss the yelling in the mornings and the late night video making and just walk the crazy shit they'd do throughout the house.

"I think you've cleaned enough." Marley says, pulling the broom away from me.

"I guess so.." I fix the bed for the fifth time.

"Jaz, it was nice the way you do it the first time." He pulls me away before I can try to "fix" it again.

"You're right. I'm just.. it looks exactly the way it did when I first woke up here." It looks plain and boring. "Sorry, we can go now." I slump out of the room.

I really don't have much. It's a little sad. I feel like I have a lot less than when I got here. My clothes fits in two boxes, my stuffed animals in another, shoes and bags in one, and everything else in two more. Six boxes hold my things.

I walk through the bottom floor once before I make an attempt to leave. I don't hesitate to walk out and it makes me feel bad. I am sad to leave, but I know it's for the best. They can continue doing their thing with less problems around.

I don't mind the silence so much now. The drive to Marley's house is short. There isn't much we could talk about anyways. We only have what we need to talk about, that we want to do alone with no distractions. Luckily for us, his mom and Aimee aren't coming back until tomorrow. That gives us enough time to vent to each other.

"You can have my room." He says once we're in his driveway.

"We can put the boxes in the garage. I'll sleep on the couch." I don't want to be a bother. I don't know how long I will be staying, so I can't just agree to take his room. I wish I had a game plan in my head, but I really don't have a clue of what my next step should be.

"So my room it is then." He says and closes his car door, leaving me with my mouth open.

No matter how much I fight him, he ignores me and carries the boxes to his room. When he puts down the last box and turns to me, he freezes.

"Are you okay?" I walk from his bed to him and he backs away until he hits the door, making it close.

"Jaz.." He frowns and closes his eyes.

Jaz. Those three letters. They secretly drive me crazy. They do something to me that I really don't understand. I sometimes don't notice it, but lately I really have been. I just haven't been thinking too much of it. He's still tired, but it isn't just him saying half my name or a nickname. It's like he's begging me to help him when he says it and he has been saying it too much lately. The way he says it makes my heart do a somersault for crying out loud. That isn't subtle. I notice that. I really wish I understood him though. Why he needs my help. What he needs it for. How am I suppose to help? Seriously, how am I suppose to?

I have a million feelings coursing through my body and I don't know what any of them mean. I feel everything I once felt for someone not to long ago for this boy, but it doesn't feel sudden. It feels like I have been hiding this. I feel dirty. I feel like such a liar. It's like I been hiding this from myself and everyone else. But I haven't been. The idea just never came up, because how could it. I was damaged. I was that pathetic girl. Heck, I still am. But it isn't so bad now. I am, as sad as it is, at the best point in my life. Or as best as it's going to get, but who am I to limit myself now. After everything that has happened. Things that I thought would never happen have happened. I have specific people to thank for everything, and I will forever be grateful.