Healing a broken heart

Round one fight

Chapter 94

ELLAPOV

I'm not looking forward to today I start treatment. They took me in this morning and have a port in my neck. Norman promised me that he'll be here he's cutting it fine.

"Mrs. Reedus it's time."

"Are you sure we can't wait?"

"No ma'am we need to get you started, come on I'll help you into this wheelchair."

The nurse helps me into the chair and wheels me to the oncology section. The oncology nurse explained to me what I needed to do, and how I was supposed to look after myself especially after the next 48hrs as this treatment will hit me and I'll be sick. I was made comfortable in a chair and they inserted the catheter into the port. The nurse said I need to relax so it won't hurt as much if I do it'll go quicker. At least I have my phone with me so I can entertain myself while I'm doing this I wonder where Norman is he said he'd try and be here, but he's probably busy. I decided to post a selfie and put it on Instagram:

The first day of a new life I'll beat this and I shine until tomorrow I've never let anything beat me before this is no different. Xoxoxo

I looked at the picture I looked like crap but what do you expect, I've just had major surgery, and I also had a visit from a gynecologist earlier today she explained everything I'll need to do because I no longer have the ovaries that I'll need to be on hormone treatments for the rest of my life. I should be happy I still have my vagina I could've lost that as well but I didn't. At least I can have sex if I feel like it sometimes I hope Norman's okay because god only knows when we'll be able to sleep together again it took six weeks to recover when I had the c-section I'll be at least that depending on how sick this treatment will make me. But I know it's for the best I want to live I want to grow old with my family. I'm taken out of my thoughts when my phone rang.

"Hey, babe."

"Sean. It's good to hear your voice. I didn't think you'd ever speak to me again."

"Like you could get rid of me babe. So what's happening?"

"Hasn't Norman spoken to you?"

"No, I called you. So what's up buttercup?"

"I have cancer babe."

"What type?"

"Ovarian."

"Oh fuck me."

"Already done that babe quite a few times if I remember correctly."

"So you're okay?"

"I'm having my first round of chemotherapy now babe."

"Ah man, that's heavy. How's Norman doing?

"He was okay last night I haven't seen him today."

"He's not there with you?"

"I'm sure he has his reasons, he doesn't have to be here Sean."

"If it was Lauren heaven forbid I'd never leave her side."

"Well, there's something you can do for me."

"Sure fire away."

"I need you to keep an eye on Norman, I don't want him getting in over his head what with Boondock's three promotions I don't want him worrying about me. Look after him if you have to look after him to relax him I'm okay."

"I don't understand."

"You know I won't be able to look after he shouldn't suffer it's his fault. I'm sure you know discreet girls."

"I'm not getting him chicks on the side, he would flip if he heard you say that. Norman's a good guy, he wouldn't do that don't push that on him, babe. We'd rather get you fixed if you couldn't have sex babe that would be a damn shame because that pussy of yours is amazing I'm sure Norman says the same thing."

"Ah, you say the sweetest things, Sean."

"Mean every word, babe. Also if Norman can't be there for treatment then I'll be there in a heartbeat you got that Ella."

"Thanks, babe. I better go I'm not sure if I'm supposed to talk when I'm in here. Can you send my love to the kids and Lauren and tell her I'll call her when I'm feeling better."

"Of course, I will. Bye babe."

I have to do something while here sitting with my thoughts isn't a good thing. Would I be happy if he had a piece on the side? No, I wouldn't but it might happen, what if I'm not back to normal and look at me I saw stomach I have an incision running the length of my stomach how's he going to look at me when I can't look at myself? I wouldn't blame him.

"So what type do you have sweetheart?"

"Me? Ovarian."

"Haven't seen you in here before."

"No, it's my first treatment."

"If you don't mind me asking do you have kids?"

"Yeah, four kids a fifteen-year-old, a fifteen-month-old, and two six months."

"Wow, fifteen years that's a big gap between kids."

"Oh he's my husband's son but I love him as if his my own.

"Good to hear, you hear a lot today about families that have kids from previous relationships having trouble with their new mom or dad that it causes problems in the relationship, I'm glad to see your family's different."

"What about you kids or grandkids?

"Oh me no I ever got around to having kids. I'm Jessica. I'm breast cancer."

"I'm Ella. And I already told you ovarian cancer."

"So did they take everything or not?"

"I still have my vagina. Everything else is gone. It's weird the things that make me a woman were trying to kill me. I don't know whether to be happy they're gone or sad that they are."

"You should speak to the counselors here they're good. But I get what you're talking about I felt the same when I had my operations."

Just then the nurse walked back in and said that I was finished and that I needed to drink lots of fluids to flush out the chemicals in my system. There were other rules as well that I had to follow I didn't need to go back to get more treatment for three weeks they've used a radical treatment normally it's every six weeks but they want to try every three weeks and see how I go. I just wanted rest and lots of it I'm exhausted.

One of the nurses takes me back to my room and when I get there I was hoping for Norman but he wasn't. Where is he?