I Don't Do Relationships

Just You and Me

My ex-boyfriend had to know, by using the name Klaus, I was done.  The problem was, I felt my guard creeping back up just a little and I was going to have to push it back down.  Then seeing these two guys go at it a little, I felt so many different things at once.  It irritated me for some reason though, maybe because the two of them were acting like fools over me. 

On the other hand, it made me sad.  It reminded me of how messy and hard relationships can be.  I became so used to being my own person, not worrying about a relationship,  that I didn't like these two guys trying to tell me I shouldn't be around the other. 

Then there was the fact that Chris was trying to protect me, as was Scott and that made me feel safe and wanted.  My emotions were ranging between so many variations at the moment. The whole way to the door, my mind was racing back and forth so fast I didn't realize I had tears running down my cheeks.  Scott noticed first while we stood by the front entrance, waiting for a taxi.

Reaching up, Scott placed a hand on each side of my face as he bent down to my eye level and rubbed the tears away from my cheeks.  "That's enough of those tears now sweetie pie.  Let's get you back so you can forget about all this."

All I could do was nod as I let go of Chris' arm to wipe my tears that were still falling.  I needed to be in my own space, not clinging to Chris right now.  The feeling of him watching me was very present, I didn't even need to see him to know his eyes were on me.  As the car pulled up, Scott went around to the other side while Chris opened my door.  I felt his hand touch the small of my back as I ducked into the empty car while Scott was already telling the driver where to go.  Once Chris was in the car, I glanced over to look at him but something else caught my eye.

At the door to the venue, I saw my ex-boyfriend standing there watching me leave.  Chris noticed my eyes fixating on something past him, outside the car window.  From the corner of my eye, I saw Chris turn to see what had caught my attention.  He turned back to look at me, but I couldn't look away from what I'd seen.  Roles had reversed this time with Nicky.  It seemed like I was the one causing tears, because that was what I saw on the man's face at the door watching me leave him this time. 

Once our car began to move,  my eyes moved back a fraction, focusing on the concerned expression Chris had on his face.  It was obvious he didn't really know what to say and we all stayed fairly quiet in the cab.  With my hands clasped in my lap, I laid my head straight back against the seat, my eyes closed, feeling  the two men looking at me like I was about to break.  I didn't realize I was so tense until I my hands felt tingly from holding them together so tightly.

Opening my eyes, I found my suspicions were correct and both Evans men tried to look quickly away.  It had been too late though.  The cab eventually came to a stop and Chris hopped out, holding his hand out for me.  Scott exited from the door on his side and paid while I was getting out with his brother. 

Chris quietly questioned me while we waited for Scott to finish.  "You okay?"

Nodding, I looked into his face, finding the same worried expression from before.  He knew my wheels were turning, I could see it in his eyes, probably wondering how much this was going to effect me. As Scott walked around the car, he actually reached for my hand, maybe seeing that Chris looked lost as to how to handle the situation.  We had brought one bag together since we were having to go straight to the event tonight from the airport and leaving tomorrow.  All of this meant we only needed the one change of clothes. Scott had made some sort of arrangement for it to be delivered to the front desk for us to pick up when we arrived.  He asked Chris to grab it while we made our way to wait and hold the elevator.

Once Chris had the bag and we were in the elevator, Scott was wiping at my face with his thumbs again while Chris pushed the button for the floor his room was on.  Just as the doors began to close, two women ran to the elevator, asking for it to be held.  Chris put his hand out on the door to hold it.   I backed up against the wall, not wanting any attention drawn to us.  Scott had let go of my hand and had his arm around my shoulder, tucking me in tightly to him.   Laying my head against his chest, I wrapped my arms around my friend. As the women stepped inside and the doors shut, Chris took a step back also, dropping his head a little, so he was in line with Scott and I.  It was too late though.