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Chapter 9

*Harry's POV*

 I don't go to sleep until I can hear Allison's steady breathing. Shit have I missed being able to hold her like this and I'm just hoping she can forgive me for my big fuck up even though I wouldn't blame her if she didn't. In fact, I'd completely understand if she never wanted to see me again.

I've gotta convince her. Convince her I'm not the asshole that left her years ago. I've got to do something for her, show her how sorry I am and how I really feel about her. Hell, it won't be easy but I'm willing to put forth the effort if it means winning her back. Those years without her were hell. I couldn't eat or sleep or talk to first few weeks, but I had to mask my pain because of The XFactor auditions. I wanted to make to pursue my idiotic, childish dreams, even if it meant leaving her. Wow. I was such a dumbass. Being famous definitely isn't all it's cracked up to be and if I could go back and do it all over again, I would and not hesitate about it either.

 I slowly open my eyes snd they're immediately united with hers. Damn. I'm taken back for a second because they're just so fan captivating and gorgeous. I miss her face being the first I see in the morning.

"Morning." I say and she smiles.

"Morning." she whispers back and I can feel th silliest snd cheesiest of all smiles taking over my features. Man, what she does to me. We get up and stretch and I pull her close to me.

 "I have something planned for you today. But don't ask what it is. It's a surprise." I tell her. I'm more excited to do what I have planned for her than a kid on Christmas Eve. She raises her eyebrow and I smile wider but it's one of the cutest things I've ever seen.

 "Well, I have to go to work and its... almost eight o'clock! I'm supposed to be there in thirty minutes." she exclaims, obviously startled as she trips over her own feet running up her stairs. I explore my surroundings while I walk after her, considering the fact I've obviously never been in her house before. I follow her into her room and look around.

 "Shit. I still have to take a shower." she sits on her bed and puts her forehead in her hands. I go sit next to her, taking her hands down and taking them in mine.

"Your hands are fucking freezing." I whisper and begin to rub some warmth back into them. I can feel her eyes examining my every move. I blow some hot air on them and then kiss the back of the soft skin.

 "Alli, you go take a shower, I'll get your clothes." I say, looking up to finally meet her eyes I'm immediately trapped in her soft gaze. She then looks at me warily as if she's debating whether or not she should let me. Probably remembering what I did the last time...

 You see, she was going on a date with this guy and I knew he was a complete and total one-hundred percent genuine ass, but there was nothing I could do to stop her. So, I picked out the most hideous outfit for her, knowing she wouldn't pay attention to what she was wearing until after she was there with him since she was rushing. She was so mad at me, but as always, she didn't stay mad for long and we were able to laugh together soon afterwards, but, there's something else.

I've liked Allison for a long fucking time. We're talking like more than five years. Actually...much longer than five years. I've always wanted to see if our relationship could be something more than just friendly, but I didn't want to jeapordize what we already had.

 I've felt this way for a really long time I just never knew how to tell her. And then when I abandoned her, it was too late to tell her. Damn, I don't know if she'll even be friends with me, so I'm trying not to get my hopes up too high. That's why I would go out and fuck with all those other girls why I would be drunk every other night. It helped ease the pain; get my mind off of her. She filled all of my thoughts. But all it did was fill me with even more guilt. I was literally going around in circles. Think about Alli, feel horrible, go out, get drunk, sleep with some random girl that I would find at a club, feel even more guilty, get even more drunk, and I was making people worried sick about me in the process. It seemed like no matter what I did, I was hurting someone.The boys were worried about me, my parents were worried about me, and my sister, Gemma was worried about me, but I don't want to do that anymore.