Destined

" A burning Stare"

As I rammed the plunger into the mortar, trying to mash the Marigold for an antiseptic cream, my lips were pressed into an angry line. My attacks on the poor plant were silently observed by my grandfather, who sat beside me, manifacturing bandages for wounds. I knew, that he waited paitently for me to tell him, what was going on in my life. Yesterday he saw the state I was in, when I entered the house, all churned up by my talk with Gaisgeil. Granddad was old and wise. He wasn't nosy or intrusive - he waited, knowing, when the right time would come, I'd tell him. 

I had a resentful nature that wasn't easily willing to forgive, when somebody hurt me - not one of my best traits, I knew that. "Why do you think, this plant deserves to be masacred by you?", the amused voice of my grandfather interrupted my inner rambling. My hand halted over the mortar. Huffing I layed the plunger on the table, my head resting on my chin.

"What's eating you up, child? Was it something your destined said?" Grandfather's eyes roamed my face, worry written on his wrinkled forehead. I watched him, biting my lips while weighing my options: be honest and make my grandfather wary, or use white lies, so he wouldn't worry too much? I exhaled deeply. "I'll tell you granddad, but you promise not to get upset?! It's really not good for your health." He chuckled. "Dear, I lived a long and challenging live, seen and heard many things that upset me. I am not that fragile, and won't die, I promise", he laughed.

My grandfather was the best, I stood up and hugged him wholeheartedly. "But you have to promise me one thing", I watched him desperately. "You are not allowed to die ... not now, not ever." He laughed out loud, kissing me on my cheek. "Oh my sweet girl, I can promise to hold out until you won't need me anymore." I shook my head violently. "That won't do, I'll need you forever ...", I burst out crying.

He stroke my head in a comforting way. "There, there my child...let it all out. Tell me what is torturing you..." And I told him, everything. He listened silently, not interrupting my thoughts. As I stopped hiccuping he watched me intently. "Be honest, what exactly is hurting you? Your pride or your heart."

I felt startled. The wheels in my head turned rapidly. My old grandfather was wise...he put his finger exactly into the wound. Was my pride hurt because my destined betrayed me...or my heart, because I really felt something for him? The first option was pure logic, because I am proud, but the second was disturbing and annoying. Did I feel something for Gaisgeil, this dangerous being? For a man, who is destined by faith as my soulmate? A man, I did not really know well?

"I don't know ...", my feeble whisper irretated me. I coughed. "Am not sure, granddad...really", I repeated in a stronger voice. "Than what DO you know, sweeheart?", he mocked me tenderly. Huffing and puffing I started to pace the floor. "He is irritating, cruel, moody, dominant, a cheater...he is ....he is...", I stopped abruptly. My grandfather waited paitiently. "Yes?", he pressured slightly. Slowly I turned around, the blood draining from my face. My grandfather stood up, nearing me slowly. With a sob I threw myself in his outstretched arms.

"Hush, minha filha...shhh...don't cry. The truth always sets you free, you only have to admit your true feelings." My grandfather cradled me in his arms, back and forth like a toddler who needs reassurance. And it worked. My cries subdued. "But I don't want to feel anything for him. He is our enemy, granddad, he is the cause of our pain. How can I allow myself to feel anything for this creature? I am not that pathetic!" 

He tilded his head. "You are NOT pathetic when you admit, that you have feelings for your destined. It's not a crime, on the contrary. Nature doesn't make mistakes." I snorted. "Well this time nature made a big fat mistake. I can't be ...", my rambling was interrupted by a knock on our door that startled us both. Who would make a visit this late? The guards, send by Gaisgeil to fetch me? My anger rose again.

Growling I rushed to the door, ready to throw a fit at whoever was in front of our door. "What do you want", I growled nearly like a Creachadair, but stopped when I saw our visitors. "Elder Consilius", I gaped as I recognised one of the most respected Elders of our Daonnachd council. His penetrating gaze showcased his strong will. "You must  be Callida, the very promising granddaughter of  Ascan!" I wasn't intimidated but I knew how to behave in a descent and right way. I bowed my head respectfully, my eyes directed on the ground. 

My grandfather rushed by my side. "Consilius, what an honour to welcome you to my humble home. Please, do come in." Although my grandfather spoke in a calm and friendly way, I heard the subtext in his voice. He was concerned. And when I saw the knowing smile on the Elder's face, I knew, he had a reason to be concerned. I looked behind the Elder only to notice a second and third man, which made me uneasy. Why shoud three men - probable send by our counsil - visit in the midst of the night?

"Oh, where are my manners." Consilius turned around to make space for the other men. "Now let me introduce one of our new and youngest members of our counsil", he announced. One man approached from the shadows. He was tall and lean with black hair and the bluest eyes  I've ever seen. "May I enter your house, honorable Ascan?", a pleasant but manly voice asked. Baffled I watched the scene unfold. My grandfather and the stranger both bowed in front of each other. When the very handsome Daonnachd rose, his burning stare landed on me.