Catch Me | Jin x Reader

Ch 15 | Burden

Y/N's POV:

Your heavy eyelids slowly start to flutter open as you feel an uncomfortable sensation creeping into your neck. Although the rest of your body is incredibly relaxed, this centralized ache is pulling you out of your deep sleep.

You take a big deep breath as your groggy eyes open fully, trying to take in your surroundings. You're instantly met with Seokjin's beautiful side profile as he sleeps on his back. His long eyelashes are almost sparkling due to the moonlight peaking through the curtains. His firm shoulder is what your head's been resting against, making your neck crane at an awkward angle.

Your eyes travel down to watch his bare chest slowly rise and fall underneath your palm, instantly filling your stomach with warmth and butterflies.

But it doesn't last long.

Both embarrassment and anguish begin replacing the warmth in your body as Dal and Seokjin's panicked faces come flooding back to your mind. You're slowly remembering the news about Ga-Ram and your panic attack on the bathroom floor.

"No," you whimper silently to yourself, sitting up on the mattress. "Oh my god." A tear rolls down your cheek as you look at Jin's sleeping face next to you.

Things were going so well, what the fuck is wrong with you, [Y/N]?

Your eyes glance over at the clock on the side table and it reads 4:12am. Looking around, you don't recognize the room you're in. Seokjin must've brought you to his bed with him after your meltdown, which makes you feel even worse. Tears stream down your face as the sorrow and guilt come crashing over you in waves.

You probably ruined the party for everyone.

The wretched feeling in your chest is beginning to overwhelm you. You're mortified and disgusted with yourself, and you can feel the sobs trying to escape from your throat.

Jin has been so good to you and you went and ruined his night.

You notice the RJ plushie next you and grab him to squeeze him tightly to your chest, hoping to relieve some of the ache. You turn to face away from Jin and lay back down, burying your face into the back of RJ's head, trying to silence your crying.

You sob for a minute or two and flinch when you feel Jin's arms wrap around you from behind.

"Hey," he whispers, "you're okay."

You grip his wrist and push him away, crying harder into the soft white plushie. You feel miserable, and you know his kindness is going to make you feel worse.

"[Y/N]," he says softly, scooting himself closer to you. His hand begins to gently caress your back.

"Don't," you choke out and he removes his hand, lying still next to you. He remains quiet behind you as you continue your stifled sobs.

"Talk to me," he finally says to you. "I can't help you if you won't talk to me."

"I don't need your help," you snap at him, which only makes you even more disgusted with yourself. You squeeze his RJ plushie tighter against you, wishing you could just crawl into a hole and never come back out.

"I know you don't," he responds calmly. "I'm asking you to talk to me to make me feel better, not you."

Your body tenses up while your traumatized brain tries to make sense of what he's saying.

"Not everything is about you," he says with irritation in his voice.

Your crying stops as your eyes almost pop out of your head. You slowly pull your blubbery face out of the white plushie and turn over your shoulder in an attempt to understand what the fuck just came out of his mouth.