Hold me under the stars-Drarry

Epilogue

(CHAPTER NOT EDITED)

Song=Ashes-Cèline Dion (I would recommend listening to the song when you've finished reading)

Harry

Another month had gone by.

The pain was still there, knawing under my skin. But in faint moments it felt forgotten.

I'd started coming to the hill every weekend. I would usually sit there under the tree, and wait for darkness to surround me, and the stars became visible. Sometimes I felt like I could still hear his soft voice whisper in my ear.

"My missing star."

I talked more with Hermione and Ron again. About Draco, and about other things. They'd been there while I'd broken down, ready to pick the pieces with me. I'd been a mess. I'd yelled at them. Thrown things at them. Called them stuff I would forever regret. But they'd stayed. And god, I'll never be sure how.

Sometimes they came to the hill too.

I told them about the time Draco took me out here the first time. How everything had felt so new and pure. When neither of us could've imagined what was about to come. I told them the day I realized I loved him.

Today was a Saturday, and I'd walked my usual walk towards the hill. I found my usual spot next to the tree and leaned up against the hard surface. I enjoyed the wind kissing my cheeks, the waves striking the beach in the horizon.

I almost hadn't noticed Blaise approaching me in the distance.

He sat down next to me, no words spoken between us.

We'd talked a few times since Draco had died. I felt like he was the only one who understood the rotting feeling hiding inside. We'd told each other stories about some of the stupidest things that boy had made us do. It had somehow awoken that old feeling that Draco was never fully dead.

Blaise had shown me that it would get better. That the pain would always be there, but you would learn to live with it.

"Hey," he finally said, his voice low.

"Hey," I muttered back.

He pulled something out of his pocket and I stared at a white envelope in his hand.

"Draco gave me this the day he left."

I met his gaze.

"I haven't opened it, but he told me it was for you. It had been for some project I believe, but he never told me what it was about."

He handed me the envelope and I hesitated before reaching out for the soft paper.

"I'm sorry I never gave this to you before, but I just don't think it would've made anything better if I'd given it to you while well..."

"While I was a mess?" I asked, a smile tugging my lips.

"Well, yes," he chuckled.

I looked at the green little seal on the back and started parting it from the paper.

"I'm gonna let you read it alone. I'll see you later?"

"Sure," I smiled at him.

I watched as he disappeared down the stairs before opening the envelope and pulling the white parchment out.

His smell was still scented on the paper and I had to catch my breath for a couple of seconds before opening the letter.

Tears filled my eyes when I saw the handwriting.

"Where do I think I am going to be in a couple of years?

That was the question we'd all been asked. The answer to this is quite simple: I have absolutely no idea.

Since the day I was born, there has always been someone to decide what's best for me. Or at least what they thought was best for me.

For as long as I can remember I've been told that I was meant to make my family proud. It didn't matter if I wanted to, it was just how it would be.

I never thought choosing would be so hard. That it could even be a possibility.

But then one day I met a boy. He was annoying and stubborn beyond anything. He made me question every part of myself to a point where I thought I was going mad. For a long while, I hated him. I hated the way he made life seem easy. I hated the way he made me think there was a way I could choose a future for myself. I hated the way he never realized that he was the one who made me feel complete.

I loved him. I really did. I've never understood how love worked. I still really don't. How it follows us like our own shadows, striking only when we are not looking. But I felt like every tiny, little piece of my crippled heart belonged to him. And I believe it always will. He was my missing star. But only he made me figure out what that truly meant.

And for that, I will always be grateful.

So, thank you

-Yours, Draco

I stared at the paper for a long time. A tear had escaped the corner of my eye and ran freely down my cheek. My breathing had turned heavier.

I read the letter again. And again. I read it 15 times before putting it back in the envelope. The letter hadn't made the pain go away, it hadn't made me relieved like I'd thought it would.

But it did do one thing;

It reminded me of not how Draco had died, but how he had lived.

The sky had turned dark, and stars were hanging over my head. I still held the envelope in my hand.

I closed my eyes and finally let go.

***

On a cold evening, a boy sat under the stars. His heart was beating fast and steady, but alone. Another boy had promised to hold him under the stars for as long as it was possible. The boy with a beating heart hadn't been there when the crash had hit. The crash that made a heart stop. He hadn't been there to say goodbye. Now the boy was sitting alone in the darkness looking up at the lights. A tear fell down his cheek as one last promise was given.

"Goodbye."