Stone

Prologue

Kahel

It's easy to be a bully at napakadaling mang-bash ng tao. Marami ring mahilig maki-bash. Iyong hindi naman nila alam ang totoong issue, pero ang hilig nilang makisawsaw.

Hindi ko sila pinapatulan. It's hard to argue with people who can't think for themselves.

Ang buhay mag-aaral ko ay madalas nasa bottom ng social food chain. My high school life became a mess when someone else outed me. I'm gay; I wasn't ready to let the world know, but my ex-boyfriend was ready to do it for me instead. Then he denied our relationship when he saw how people reacted to my sexuality.

I honestly didn't know na kasalanan pala ang maging bakla.

I was left there alone, hanging by a thread. Strange eyes were darting, judging my personality based on someone else's mouth. That was supposed to be my closet. I was happy inside it. I should have been the one to open it on my own.

Mula nang ilantad ako, my teammates from the swimming team felt used. The girls who used to have a crush on me felt betrayed. Hindi ko naman sila inaano. I was just a quiet boy minding my own business, away from anyone's eyes. Pero sinimulan nila akong kutyain dahil sa paglilihim ko. Dapat daw matagal na akong umamin ara hindi na raw umasa ang mga nagkagusto sa akin. Para hindi na raw naghubad sa harap ko ang mga teammates ko tuwing nagbibihis kami sa locker room after practice.

Pambihirang buhay 'to. Lumabas man ako o magtago sa loob ng closet ay kasalanan ko pa rin. Worse, they wanted me to come out at their own convenience.

Sa pagkakaalala ko, closet ko 'yon, hindi kanila.

I have this talent for being blamed for things I've never done. Hindi ko rin alam kung bakit. Hindi naman ako mukhang tarantado. Mabait naman ako, and I always follow the rules. I'm nice, both physically and emotionally.

Perhaps that was the problem. I looked and acted too nice, and I tend to overlook people who have done me wrong. That's why some people think that I'm always willing to take the blame. Mas madali yata para sa kanila ang magturo ng daliri kaysa alamin ang totoo. Maybe I'm just unlucky. So when I reached college, I decided to stay low-key.

Pero may biglang sumulpot na asungot sa buhay ko, si Drake. He has been pestering me in school and even at my job at the mall.

I honestly thought he liked me. We even kissed one time. But seeing him with his ex-girlfriend being so touchy makes me think otherwise. Actually, ayos lang naman sa akin para tantanan na niya ako. Ilang araw ko na siyang iniiwasan. Ayoko na ng gulo. The last thing I want is to be the center of attention, dahil nali-link ako sa pambansang heartthrob ng paaralan ko. Doon na lang siya sa babae niya, mukha naman siyang masaya. At saka mukhang maipapasa ko naman itong bagong trabaho ko. Drake has been searching for me at my part-time job at the mall, and I guess this new job in Ocean Park would suffice habang tinataguan ko siya.

"Kahel ang pangalan mo, tama?" tanong sa akin ng mamang naka-pang-janitor uniform. Hindi ko talaga akalaing siya ang may-ari ng Ocean Park na 'to. Magulo kasi ang buhok niya, medyo balbas-sarado, at siya mismo ang naglilinis ng aquarium nila. Sa tantiya ko ay nasa edad 40 na siya.