It's not me, It's you!

Forgive and Forget

POV: Matty

“Get out and call my mom” I said looking down.

“Orange please hear me o..” he started,

“Nyle, Please” I said motioning him to leave. I heard the door open not after few minutes,

“Matty” my mom voice echoed the room. She sounded worried on the verge of tears, but not as worried as I am.

The fact that Nyle believed his mom say, ‘I almost killed her’ Seriously??? I was a child then. All the while he was talking to me thinking me as a psychopath and here I am blindlessly in love with him. How stupid I’ve been?

“Why Mom?”

“Matty?” she asked confused as if why do ask her ‘Why?’

“He thought me as a psychopath who wanted his sister’s life. I was barely 5 years old mom, how could I even think about those things? He said he was wanting to take revenge on me…What am I? A villain?”

“Do you know who is the reason for all these things? It was you!!! It was Because of you!!!. I understand you saved the child’s life. Cudos to you!!! But who gave you rights to hurt me? And lie to everyone about the same?”

“Matty..” It was my dad, I didn’t heard his voice until then

“Oh hey dad! How do you feel seeing me like this? Go celebrate your victory” I was fuming with anger burning anyone and anything on my way.

“Matty, I’m so sor…”

“NO!!! Don’t even think about it! Sorry is for those who wronged something. But You? You knew all of this… and what do you did? Left for military saying some bullshit! And look at me now, I’m Fucking Blind, All thanks to you guys”  at this point I was breathing heavily…

“I wish I was never born. I hate myself…You know, I never regretted anything in my life, but right now, I’m regretting that I am born to you. I fucking regret it! But it was not my choice you see, It was god’s decision, I didn’t had a choice, if I had I would reverse the time and been never born to you!!!” I finished the last part. I went silent for a minute processed what I just said,

“I’m sorry, that was a mean thing to say” I said, both were silent, until I heard soft sobs of my mom.

Just for now just this second, I’m happy that I couldn’t see anything and my mom’s tears.

Soon after the door clicked open and then closed, seems like they left. Good for me, I didn’t know what came over me…  I never mean to say those things to them. May be I’m pouring my anger towards them because I couldn’t show it to Nyle? I don’t know, but I can possibly say that must be the reason.

But if I think in Nyle’s prespective he can also be justified, I would definetly act like him if I heard someone trying to kill my brother I wouldn’t think it through, but at the same time it hurts like hell to think that the conversations we had so far is just him acting, just so he can make me have trust in him and then finally he’ll hurt me. What a cruel thing is this??? This is so fucked up

Suddenly I heard the door clicking open and I could possibly say that its Theo…

“Theo…?” I called, no response
I felt the bed dip my side, someone sat in it. At this point I can confirm it’s him

“Hey…” I asked frantically moving my hands towards him.
He took it and placed it between his hands,

“I’m sorry…” he said after a while his voice losing its usual tone

“And why is that?” I asked sounding normal, he doesn’t deserve my angry.

“For not being there for you when you needed me the most” That’s the deepest thing that he could ever say to me