Milly: I feel like a chicken nugget
Elliot: you are a chicken nugget
Milly: Ty
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Hailey: What's it like being tall?
Zander: Is it nice?
Milly: Can you reach comfortably for the cupboards?
Luke: We live in constant fear of the short ones who, in my experience, will climb four chairs, two boxes, a small coffee table, and six oddly placed stools to get what they want.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
In text (Luke's pov)
🍯Honeybun☺️
I'm sleepy
Go to bed
But I want to talk to you
Then don't go to sleep
But I'm sleepy
Im gonna kill you
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
In text (Jake) (Zander's pov)
+44 892 555 417
Your profile picture inspired me to
Talk to you
Thank you
Let me take it down
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
In text (Jakes pov)
🍇Grape🍇
Unsilence ur notifications
No fuck you
🍇ᴳʳᵃᵖᵉ🍇 ʰᵃˢ ⁿᵒᵗⁱᶠⁱᶜᵃᵗⁱᵒⁿˢ ˢⁱˡᵉⁿᶜᵉᵈ
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Drew: I want you
Jake: then act like it
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Jake: Hey, random question, what are your favorite flowers?
Hailey: Peonies, why?
Jake:
Hailey: Were you going to get me flowers?
Jake:
Hailey:
Jake: ᶦᵗ'ˢ ᵃ ᵖᵒˢˢᶦᵇᶦˡᶦᵗʸ
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Jake: How is the most beautiful person in the world?
Hailey: *blushing* I—
Luke, butting into the conversation: Zander is perfect, thanks for asking.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Seán: of course you have white hair and trauma
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Zander: oh your touch starved? Here eat up
*Fucking punches Jake/Drew*
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Jake: I just ended a 5 year relationship
Daisy: omg are you okay?
Jake: I'm fine, it wasn't my relationship
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Luke: Shakespeare would be proud
Luke: maybe
Luke: I didn't know him personally
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Jake: IM NOT A FUCKBOY
Zander: sounds like something a fuckboy would say
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Zoey: your honour, they simply hate to see a girl boss wining
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Maria: *talking about Jake and Daisy* they make a cute couple, huh?
Lia: they certainly are standing next to each other
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Luke: Hailey?..-
Hailey: *sighs* Jake used to call me that...
Luke: ...because that's your fucking name.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Henry: Drew, I'm afraid...
Drew: just stay close to Zoey
Henry: that's why I'm afraid
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Milly: Hello all, it is I, your favorite person.
Luke: Actually, Zander is my favourite.
Milly: Okay then, it is I, that bitch.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Luke, in a high voice, holding Barbie: Hey, Ken! I was thinking about going back to school and starting a career!
Milly, in a deep voice, holding Ken: Nonsense, Barbie. You're staying home and having my kids.
Hailey: What the fuck are you guys doing?
Luke: Playing systemic oppression.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Jake: Zander's gonna kill me
Luke: no, he'll probably make me do it
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Shannon, talking about Jake: Is this a friend of yours, Alexander?
Zander: Kind of? Not really. They're in my life and there's nothing I can do about it.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Milly: *Gasp*
Seán: wHAT??
Milly: What if soy milk is just milk introducing itself in Spanish?
Seán: *inhales*
Luke, in another room with Zander: Why can I hear screeching?
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Drew: I lost Henry.
Liam: How did you LOSE Henry?!
Drew: To be fair, he's very small.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Milly: Oh god, he texted you 'hi.'' punctuation only means one thing, Luke. He's mad at you.
Luke: No, it's Zander. He's just being grammatically correct!
*meanwhile*
Zander: And then I used a period so he'll know that I'm mad at him.
Hailey: Zander period doesn't say 'I'm mad', it says 'you're dead to me'.
Zander: I stand by my choice.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Hailey: You know, Luke gives Zander flowers everyday, I wish you'd do that too.
Jake: Okay.
*Later*
Jake: *gives Zander flowers*
Zander: ???
Jake: I don't know, I'm confused as well.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Zander: Your smile? It makes my day.
Luke: Your happiness? I live for that.
Hailey: A room? Get one.
Milly: Hotel? Trivago.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Luke: I don't know how to tell you this, but... I love you.
Zander: That's great, Luke. Especially considering the fact we've been married for 6 fucking years.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
YOU ARE READING
✮ Tmf incorrect quotes ✮
RandomI used a incorrect quotes generator and incorrect quotes I found on Pinterest. There is swearing, and mentions triggering words
