Sudden decisions

56 - The showdown

Can

I enter the house shrouded once again in darkness and silence.
It is almost one o'clock and I am beat, I have had a terrible day. After a hectic day at 8 p.m. I had to make an appointment with Ceyda on the Besiktas waterfront to decide if it could be the right location for her company's advertising campaign. We were supposed to meet there but as I was preparing to go I saw her show up at my office door. "What are you doing here Ceyda? We were supposed to meet in Besiktas"
"I was nearby and I thought there was no point taking a taxi alone, I might as well come with you right?" I didn't like the idea of taking her in my car at all, but as long as I got to close this blessed campaign I would have done anything.
Coming out of the underground car park I stopped to give way while waiting to turn onto the main road when she caught me completely off guard by leaning in to kiss me on the lips. I was chilled for a few moments after which a blind rage assailed me as I passed a hand over my lips in an angry gesture.
"Ne yapıyorsun, what are you doing? How did you come up with Ceyda?" She smiled as she rested a hand on my knee. 'We are finally alone and I've been wanting to do this for too long.'
I was incredulous.
"Ceyda, you know I'm married right?"
Smiling she waved a hand in the air carelessly.
"It's not a problem for me at all."
My anger threatened to reach a level I could no longer handle.
"It is a problem for me instead. I am a married man and for me there is only and only my wife, I am not interested in you or any other woman."
I firmly removed her hand from my knee saying.
"Now you are requested to get out of my car, our relationship must be purely businesslike so please take a taxi and drive to the place set for the 'appointment. I advise Deren to join you, she will tell me tomorrow what you have decided". For the first time I saw her lose the nonchalance with which she always approached me.
"But, Can..."
I was unwilling to listen to her.
"Goodbye Ceyda."
Luckily she didn't insist, I don't know if I could have continued to maintain a civilised attitude, to hell with her and her advertising campaign.
When she got off I stormed off, shaken by what had happened and it was not easy to regain control of my nerves which had been severely tested recently by everything going on in my life. I reached Metin's office well in advance, as I could spare myself the inspection with Ceyda, but I was still very late to finalise the last details of our plan. We have finally arrived at the showdown, tomorrow the trap will be sprung and there will be no escape for Emre.
I am worried, so many things could go wrong, but if everything goes as planned what worries me most is my father's reaction. Allah, may he find the strength to accept what is going to happen.
I leave the keys on the cabinet next to the door and as I wearily reach my room, I look out from the corridor to see if by chance the light in Sanem's room is on, but it's very late and of course she's been asleep for hours by now.
Another reason to feel bad, to feel guilty. I promised myself I would do everything to make it up to her and instead I just give her more reasons to hate me. It's been three days since I literally disappeared and that wasn't what was supposed to happen, not after the wonderful night when I could hold her in my arms. I let myself fall wearily on the bed in my room, bringing an arm over my eyes to try to soothe the terrible headache that has been torturing me for hours.
Tomorrow it will finally be over. I will return to her and I will be able to assure her that we no longer have to fear anything, I will be able to tell her what I have discovered and tell her that it is over, that my brother and my mother will no longer be able to harm us or the agency in any way. I feel that from there a new page in our story can begin, and it is with this renewed hope that I take a shower and try to get some rest even though it is not easy to get to sleep. I grab the pillow next to me, the one she slept on, to bring it closer to my face and look for traces of her and of that perfume of hers that has always attracted me in a crazy way and that now makes me miss her even more.

I wake up a few hours later with a start, her perfume has helped me to relax and this is nothing but the confirmation that she is my safe haven, she is my home. From tonight everything will be different, I will finally be able to go back to her to clear things up between us because the time has come to take back my life.