The Cold She-wolf

Chapter Forty-five: how do you plan to help me?

Raf's POV

   I walked into the manor, exhausted from the drama I pulled off. The plan wasn't to reject him, I didn't mean to reject him but I was angry and just spat it out. I was glad he ran away. If not I would have lived to regret it for the rest of my life. What if he accepts it because of guilt? What if I lose him? All I ever wanted since I was a child was for him to love me, and I finally had the chance to realize that dream, but I blew it, I rejected him. I cried my eyes out in school, no one could comfort me because of the pain of rejecting him, and Krystal was nowhere in sight. I knew that if she was there, she would have helped me handle the situation better. But she wasn't because Merlynn did something to her that made her mark him, and I'm sure she's wearing his mark too.

   The whole thing was complicated and exhausting. I was tired of crying and blaming myself. I wanted to blame other people like Merlynn, but blaming him was a waste of time. That guy was a dick but even if he was a dick, he didn't reject Krystal. Doesn't that make him better than the dingbat I fell in love with? Yeah, it does.

   Next on the Blame List was Ayden, my idiot brother who has no sense of loyalty to his only sister. He should have protected me the whole time and fought Frost, but he chose to protect Frost's secret even if it meant hurting me. It was moments like this that I wished Aaron was with me. Although Aaron would take it too far by trying to separate Frost's head from his body. I wanted Ayden to take a bit of Aaron's overprotective nature, and not always leave me on my own to solve my problems. What are big brothers for? He's useless.

   There was no one else to blame aside from those two, so I ended up blaming myself. I blamed myself for not taking action the moment I knew we were mates. I blamed myself for allowing him to hurt me for so long. I hated myself for still desiring him over the pain he caused me. I had every right to give him the cold shoulders for months, but I couldn't bring myself to. I blamed myself for not having a wall of steel as he did. If he wasn't cold-hearted, he wouldn't have done that horrible thing to me.

   I got to the comfort of my bedroom and threw myself on the bed, then continued from where I stopped. My heart was bleeding, he was hurting because I couldn't keep my mouth shut. I knew Frost, I was the only reason he remained himself after he thought Wynter died, the only reason he didn't kill himself. Yes, I could never replace Wynter, but I was his anchor. Rejecting him meant he would commit suicide knowing he has lost all the women he loves.

What have I done?!

   "Mom!!!" I screamed into my pillow. She was my last resort "I beg you, please!!!" My room darkened as the wind in my room changed from warm to cold. I sat up and waited for her to arrive. The wind became stronger, sweeping things off places and floating things in the air.

   "Raf," I turned around sharply. She packed herself at the edge of my bed, a smile on her face.

   "Mommy," I cried. I crawled over to her with speed and hugged her, wrapping my hands around her neck. "Baby, what's wrong?"

   "As if you don't already know,"

   "I don't pry into people's lives, remember? I prefer not to pry into everything. Now, what's wrong?"

   "It's Frost, mom, he won't love me the way I love him so I angrily rejected him." I sobbed.

   "And who told you that? If Frost didn't love you, I would never have let you come live here. He's just struggling with teenage hormones but I assure you that he loves you," she smiled.

   "But I'm hurting. Can't you hypnotize him and make him love only me like dad loves you?" I asked pettishly. She laughed, her beautiful laugh echoing in the room. What's so funny?