The Cold She-wolf

Chapter Seventy-nine: the unborn mate

Lenius' POV

I hate myself.

I hate my life.

I hate everything that deals with me.

Why? Why do I keep doing this? Why? Why can't I let her be?

   It has been like that from the very moment I met her. I didn't like Wynter one bit when I was a child. I still didn't like her. She was cruel, cold-hearted, and too harsh. I didn't like her back then because she was always scolding and yelling at me, but at the same time, most of the reckless things I did was to get her attention.

   I'd never been able to control my body and heart. Since I was a kid, I always felt the urge to please her and stay by her side. I told her the opposite of what I meant, the opposite of what I wanted. I didn't want to stay by her side, I didn't want to hurt others to get her, I just wanted her to fuck off. I always did reckless things because of her, so she would look at me and take care of me, even if I didn't mean to. There was a force urging me to maintain my relationship with her and make sure she remains with me all the time… no, there was a second personality inside of me governing what I say and what I do. I was helpless towards it and because of that, I ended up causing problems for everyone.

   I stood alone, holding my arm sadly and staring at her standing far away from me. She stood in the daylight stroking the cheek of an unconscious Lynn who was on Frost's back. She had an expression of concern and affection on her face, something she has never worn for me and will never wear now. She despised me. They all did now and it was more painful because only I knew that it was never my intention. Only I understood what was wrong with me but I couldn't tell anyone about it because the extra soul will not let me speak.

Once again, I was alone and cast aside.

   We were returning home after I ruined everything for everyone. I already did my job but I still needed to stay back. Raquelia ordered me to return immediately and I knew she was going to punish me in the worst way possible. I didn't think it would end like this. What is wrong with me?

   "You need to stop beating yourself up," the voice startled me. I turned around and saw the redhead who exposed me. I'm glad she did because if she didn't, I would have ruined Wynter's relationship. I want her to be happy even if I don't like her.

   I looked ahead, returning my gaze to Wynter who was now boarding the jet with Frost. She halted, looked at me over her shoulder, and sighed. She turned and walked in. I was surprised she didn't attack me. Maybe it was because she knew of my importance. "Thank you for what you did,"

   She giggled. "It's alright. After all, your true soul is the one who called out to me and told me everything. I only did what you asked me to do," it was a miracle the redhead could hear my voice screaming inside me and begging for help. She heard me despite the control of the other force and helped me. Since she exposed me, the controlling side hasn't shown up and I was glad. I knew there was something special about her when I first saw her, and that force knew it too and was wary of her.

   The redhead could sense emotions and detect voices through the use of emotions. She's also able to manipulate people through their emotions and access their minds and dreams thanks to that same ability. She could do quite a lot with emotions but her powers were undertrained. As a thank-you present, I offered to take her back with me and she was excited to leave this world and start afresh. I owe her.

    "I'm still grateful," I murmured, "and glad someone else other than me knows about what is controlling me,"

   "Oh yeah, about that," she said, remembering something with wide eyes. "I forgot to tell you! I could never figure it out from the start but I'd always seen that there was a bond connecting you and Miss Sage. Okay, there's one connecting you, her, Miss McKnight, and McGee, but there's also another that strongly binds you together and I believe that bind is the source of the other soul's creation. It's not even a soul, it's more like a guard to make sure you never break apart—"