Borrowed Time

Chapter 110

Getting invited to Ingrid's New Years Eve party was completely unexpected, especially since Juliette assumed that she was at her family's property in Mexico for break like she normally was... But it seemed like her parents left her home alone this year...

She wasn't even sure if she wanted to go, but they were already outside, and even though Esme was eyeing the door nervously, Juliette doubted that they'd leave right now... Micheal had been the only one to opt out, mostly because he and Tegan had agreed to watch some nature documentaries together, but also because he hated parties like this, they just weren't his thing... Sure, he'd gone during football season, but that was probably more out of obligation - now that the obligation was over, so was his attempt at being social in that way.

God, did Juliette ever envy that... It was just Shelby, Esme and herself tonight, and Shelby had been silent the whole ride here, clearly contemplative, and Esme had been rambling... They were two different sides of uncomfortable, but they had both insisted on accepting the invitation.

Why?

"So... Run it by me again. How did we get this invitation?" Esme asked, bringing Juliette out of her thoughts as she cleared her throat and sighed, shrugging... Honestly, she wasn't sure why they'd all been invited... Maybe it was a guilt thing, maybe her therapist had told her to try to rebuild bridges...

Or maybe Ingrid was just fucking weird and there was no real way to know why she did the things that she did, so it was stupid to try to figure out what she was planning.

"Pretty sure she just invited everyone... Becky and Carly are here too, I think it's just like... I think she's trying to force herself to act how she normally does, even though she's having that whole 'coming to Jesus' thing." Juliette said, putting quotes around 'coming to Jesus' because it was a weird way to say it, but that was the only way that she could think of to describe what had happened, maybe that was the church girl in her...

Maybe not... Who knew really, right?

Esme sighed at that and nodded, like it made sense... Maybe it did, but Juliette didn't exactly get how inviting someone to a party was the way to get them to 'start the forgiveness process'... That was what her therapist had called it, she was sure that Ingrid's had used a similar phrase.

"Hey, I get it... The last thing I wanted when I realized all of my shit that was wrong was to sit there and think about all the shit that was wrong." Esme said, and that made Juliette pause... Of course Esme had had to make similar sacrifices and do similar things for peace of mind when they'd begun recovery and stuff... Maybe she really was just doing it as a way to keep her mind off of things, that was entirely possible.

But that also reminded Juliette of something else... Ingrid's parties almost always had drugs, was that something that Esme was going to be okay around? It'd really shaken them up at Emma's a few weeks back.

She placed a hand on their arm, prompting them to look over at her.

"Are you gonna be okay if there's like... Coke in there?" She asked, completely unsure if that was a question that was overstepping boundaries, but she just... She wanted to be sure, she didn't want to make Esme feel like they could relapse or trigger anything, she just wanted them to have a good time with whatever they chose to do.

Esme nodded, looking forward again as they swallowed nervously... Oh baby, we don't have to do this... It's okay... We can go home... Before she could say any of that, Esme spoke again.

"I've been going to my meetings, I can call my sponsor if I need to..." Esme drummed their hands on the steering wheel, almost seeming as though they were trying to convince themself more than they were trying to convince anyone else... Which was entirely possible, honestly. "And if I really need to leave, we'll leave." They said, and Juliette nodded. That was what she needed to know, she needed to know the exit plan.