Borrowed Time

Chapter 159

Her hands felt numb, that was something that Juliette had noticed that happened when she got anxious, something that she really hadn't picked up on that much before - in fact, if anything she used to believe that she was hyper aware of herself, but that was mostly because she was trying very hard to make sure that no one was watching her, no one was looking at her as being anything other than completely normal... Now that she was no longer worried about that, her hands went numb.

And she fucking hated it... Logically, she had no reason to be that freaked out, she'd been to callbacks for things before, it wasn't the first time... But it was the first time for theater, and she wasn't sure how she was going to do, it was new... Juliette didn't like new. She took a deep breath, shaking her hands out to try to will feeling into her hands and nervousness out of her body. Did it work? A little.

Not enough.

Juliette jumped when she felt a head rest against her bicep before she looked down to see Becky leaning against her, looking just as anxious as she was. Oh. Cool.

"Okay, so..." She lifted her head, clearing her throat as she looked at Juliette with a nervous sort of smile. What's up, Aladori? "Are you freaking out? Is it stupid that I'm freaking out?" She asked, and Juliette frowned, shaking her head... This was a very real thing to be freaking out about, and she was actually really relieved that someone else was feeling the same thing.

"No." She said, and Becky looked confused... Juliette didn't know why, she was pretty sure she'd been clear in her response for once.

"To?" She asked, and Juliette blinked. Oh. That made sense, she hadn't been very good at providing clarity there, had she? Damn... And the one time that she had thought that she had it in the bag.

"Being stupid... Yeah, I'm freaking the fuck out, this is terrifying, I've never done this kinda thing before." She admitted, and Becky frowned... What issue did she find with that statement? It was true, wasn't it?

"That's not entirely true." Huh?

"Oh?" She asked, and Becky gave her a look... Cool, so what is that look about?

Juliette had never been good at subtlety, this wasn't really working for her, she needed clear clarification.

"We did the Christmas play, remember?" Becky asked, and Juliette nodded... Sure, they'd done the Christmas play, but for that the auditions had practically been a formality, and it was a fucking church production... There was a lot less pressure in a church production because the main point was that everyone had to be adorable... This took real talent that Juliette wasn't entirely sure that she possessed.

Plus, nepotism was not at play here... She didn't have a dad in charge of the whole thing to get her into things.

"Yeah, but my dad was the pastor, I got the role of Mary without auditioning every single year, this is a lot harder." Juliette reminded her, and Becky nodded, still not looking like she was wavering from something that was in her mind... Juliette wasn't sure what it could be, she'd just agreed with Becky, wasn't that what she'd been after? What else could there be now?

"You're gonna get in, Allison loves you." Oh. That. Juliette shook her head... No, she didn't actually want the nepotism this time, she wanted to get in on her own talent... She constantly wondered if she'd only gotten the position of cheer captain because she was popular or if she'd gotten it because she deserved it.

Honestly, she bet it was the first one... Katherine was up for it too, and she would've been a better captain, she had more passion for the sport, neither Juliette nor Ingrid were very passionate... But she couldn't go back and change that, could she?