Borrowed Time

Chapter 184

Rotting was very possibly Juliette's biggest talent in the entire world - she knew how to do it just as well as she knew how to breathe, even though she sometimes struggled to do that... Bad analogy. Nonetheless, she was curled up alone in Esme's bed, staring at the wall in front of her, her body both aching for her to move and stay in the same place for as long as she could.

Esme had left for school after a brief argument where they'd insisted on staying home... Juliette didn't want their grades suffering just because she wasn't in a good place right now, they deserved a lot better than that so she'd made them go, which she was sure she'd never hear the end of once they were home, but she needed to be alone, and they needed to go to school.

Fuck this...

There was a quiet rap on the door, startling Juliette as she cleared her throat.

Who is in my rot space? What is going on?

"Yes?" She called out, doing her best to not sound despondent as the door creaked open.

"Just me." She relaxed at the sound of Gianna's voice and lowered herself back down onto the bed.

"Gianna... Hey..." She croaked, not looking over at her right away... Or at all at first, because she didn't have to, not in her own mind at least.

She knew she was there, and that was enough.

"Hey kiddo..." She felt the bed dip beside her and felt Gianna's hand on her back. "You doing okay in here?" Her question was gentle, but it made Juliette grimace as she shrugged.

She wasn't sure how she was supposed to answer that... She was alive, that wasn't going to change, but she was by no means doing good right now.

She was doing fine, but not good... And she wasn't even sure if she was doing okay at this point either.

"I'm fine, yeah." She mumbled, staring at the wall of Esme's room, not moving her eyes from where they had fixed themself on the crack that etched its way up the side of it.

She didn't know what she'd do if she moved right now, and she felt unglued and uncomfortable in her own skin... It was hard for her; all of this was making her feel unhinged in a way that she never had before. She wanted to burn Samantha in her hospital bed for speaking about Caleb like he was only a pawn and not a person, she wanted to smack her dad in the mouth for not letting Dakota be around her...

And she wanted to break down knowing that there was nothing that she could've done to make her teenage years more enjoyable because a woman had decided by simply seeing her that she would never be someone worth loving.

"You sure?" No, but you don't need to know that, now do you? "You haven't moved since getting home from the hospital last night." She said, sounding more worried than Juliette had anticipated.

She didn't want Gianna bothering herself over her... She didn't deserve all of that.

"Why should I?"

"Because rotting doesn't do you any good, does it?" She asked gently, making Juliette grimace as she shrugged - there was some good to be said about rotting. It gave her time to think, time to slow down and actually feel her emotions - sure, maybe it wasn't the healthiest way to go about things like this, but it felt right sometimes.

This was one of those times.

"I mean..." She trailed off, knowing that fighting Gianna on this was probably a losing battle, and she didn't really feel like losing a battle was going to help her feel better right now.